#aw

If I hung out with Van Gogh, I don’t know what we’d do. We’d just play it by ear, I guess.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #random #random-thought

Huevos up. Swing up to the window, swing back to Al B. Hall, who says, "Bless you," and would I get him a bottle of Satan's Red-Hot Revenge for the eggs? Sure thing, Pastor. ↗

— Joan Bauer

#funny #funny

If I ever get a 20-dollar bill, I like to convert it into 20 singles, because women like guys with lots of money.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #funny #humor #money #random

Bluestar's coming on patrol? Watch out for flying hedgehogs! ↗

— -Erin Hunter Cloudpaw A Dangerous Path Warriors

#cats #cloudpaw #erin-hunter #flying #funny

Está mejor - respondió con remilgo - Afortunadamente, me lo rompió una perra psicótica, y no alguien de la familia. Le di mi mejor sonrisa psicótica. Qué mal. La familia te puede golpear por accidente. Las perras psicóticas tienden a volver por más ↗

— Richelle Mead

#funny #rose-hathaway #spanish #funny

The lawn is the last suburban frontier. It separates us from the corruption of the street and its triker gangs. When drive-by shootings occur, our grass gets a shower instead of our windows getting water-stains. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #gangs #humor #lawns #shootings

[H]is mouth pursed, but pursed in American, more generous than English pursing, ready for broader vowels and less mincing sounds. His body was long and lean and trim; he had American hips, ready for a neat belt and the faraway ghost of a gunbelt. ↗

— A.S. Byatt

#self-awareness #self-image #body-image

Dimitri's voice snapped my attention back to him. "That's Adrian Ivashkov." He said the name the same way everyone else did. "Yeah, I know." "This is the second time I've seen you with him." "Yeah," I replied glibly. "We hang out sometimes." Dimitri arched an eyebrow, then jerked his head back toward where we'd come from. "You hang out in his room a lot?" Several retorts popped into my head, and then a golden one took precedence. "What happens between him and me is none of your business." I managed a tone very similar to the one he'd used on me when making a similar comment about him and Tasha. "Actually, as long as you're at the Academy, what you do is my business." "Not my personal life. You don't have any say in that. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#love #rose-hathaway #vampire-academy #business

And besides . . . I don’t want to leave you. Er, you guys.” He smiled, and it lit up his whole face. “Well, ‘we’ are certainly happy to hear that. Oh, and I’m also happy to watch our darling little love child dragon while you’re in St. Louis.” I grinned back. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#awww #contentment #conversation #humor #love

That's ridiculous." Especially the part about Christian being manly. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#rose-hathaway #humor