#ball

What in god’s name happened to your nuts?” “They met a jet-powered water hose.” He grimaced. “They’re already healing.” A rare glint of amusement lit Lawrence’s eyes. “You have balls of steel.” “You have inappropriate humour. ↗

— Dianna Hardy

#humor #humour #nuts #torture #humor

She groaned as her face turned to press against the rosewood floor. "Welly, remind me to order a better mattress for my bed. This one is far too firm." "Oh, Eliza," Wellington gasped, now remembering why he was in these lush surroundings. "No broken nose, I hope." "S'all right," Braun slurred. Her voiced dropped to a whisper. "My ample bosom broke my fall. ↗

— Philippa Ballantine

#ministry-of-peculiar-occurrences #philippa-ballantine #tee-morris #humor

I've never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes. ↗

— Leo Durocher

#humor #sports #umpires #humor

I love seeing other channels counterprogram the Super Bowl. PBS: "DAMN RIGHT we're airing a new 'Masterpiece Classic'! Fuck off, sports! ↗

— Tara Ariano

#humor #pbs #twitter #humor

I've fallen in love with baseball. ↗

— Nick Jonas

#humor #sports #humor

Language exists less to record the actual than to liberate the imagination. ↗

— Anthony Burgess

#j-g-ballard #literature #science-fiction #writing #imagination

I'm simply reminding you that you're worth more than what you'll find at the bottom of a bottle. ↗

— Myra McEntire

#lily-garcia #self-worth #timepiece #self-worth

Even our recreation was scheduled. There was no time to look for birds or wander into the nearby woods. We were put into teams and sent into violent pursuit of a helpless ball. ↗

— Gloria Whelan

#imagination #organized-sports #play #recreation #sports

A brick is a biographical film in which a young orphan brick from the wrong side of the track grows up to be one of the most important bricks in all brick kind, as it is now quite literally the cornerstone of one of America’s greatest ballparks.(Fenway) ↗

— Nicole McKay

#baseball #brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses

I wanted to beat the heck out of the JV guys for that, except I wouldn't know what to do in a fistfight without a manual. ↗

— Carrie Harris

#football #funny #manual #nerd #funny