#because

I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#always #animal #ask #attractive #beautiful

So many people prefer to live in drama because it's comfortable. It's like someone staying in a bad marriage or relationship - it's actually easier to stay because they know what to expect every day, versus leaving and not knowing what to expect. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#actually #bad #because #comfortable #day

And I know this happens because I took economics, and I'd explain it to ya, but I flunked that course. Not my fault. They taught it at 8 o'clock in the morning. And there is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bloodshot eye. ↗

— Lewis Black

#absolutely nothing #because #clock #course #economics

I don't pay attention to the number of birthdays. It's weird when I say I'm 53. It just is crazy that I'm 53. I think I'm very immature. I feel like a kid. That's why my back goes out all the time, because I completely forget I can't do certain things anymore - like doing the plank for 10 minutes. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#attention #back #because #birthdays #certain

I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they're seeing too much. Everything is about sex, and that's fine for me. I'm not saying I don't like it. But I don't think it should be everywhere, where kids are exposed to everything sexual. Because they have to have some innocence; there's just no innocence left. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#because #every #everything #everywhere #exposed

I started playing golf when I was a kid, because across the street from where we lived there was a little nine-hole golf course where my father worked. ↗

— Lewis Black

#because #course #father #golf #golf course

The reason I do what I do is because I was influenced by Steve Martin, by Woody Allen, by Bob Newhart, by Carol Burnett, by Lucille Ball. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#ball #because #bob #burnett #carol

Trying to get the talk show, looking back on it, we had to beg a lot of station managers to pick up the show because people thought no one would watch it because I'm openly gay. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#because #beg #gay #get #had

I'm the slowest reader in the world, because I perform it all in my head. ↗

— Honor Blackman

#head #i #perform #reader #slowest

I can imagine that Rod Stewart likes giving autographs because he's pure showbusiness. ↗

— Ritchie Blackmore

#because #giving #i #i can #imagine