#cas

Nice dress Zoey. It looks just like mine. Oh, wait! It used to be mine. Aphrodite laughed a throaty, I'm-so-grown-and-you're-just-a-kid laugh. I really hate it when girls do that.I mean, yes, she's older, but I have boobs, too. ↗

— P.C. Cast

#p-c-cast #kids

Simon turned to Jordan, who was lying down across the futon, his head propped against one of the woven throw pillows. "How much of that did you hear?" "Enough to gather that we're going to a party tonight," said Jordan. "I heard about the Ironworks event. I'm not in the Garroway pack, so I wasn't invited." "I guess you're coming as my date now." Simon shoved the phone back into his pocket. "I'm secure enough in my masculinity to accept that," said Jordan. "We'd better get you something nice to wear, though," he called as Simon headed back into his room. "I want you to look pretty. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#city-of-fallen-angels #date #funny #humor #ironworks

I am a story teller. If I wanted to send a message I would have written a sermon. ↗

— Philip Pullman

#writing #story

Well, when I was five, I wanted my mother to let me go around and around inside a dryer with the clothes,” Clary said. “The difference is, she didn’t let me.” “Probably because going around and around in a dryer can be fatal,” Jace pointed out, “whereas pasta is rarely fatal. Unless Isabelle makes it. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#city-of-bones #clary-fray #dryer #jace-wayland #mortal-instruments

Don't stop there. I suppose there are also, what, vampires and werewolves and zombies?" "Of course there are. Although you mostly find zombies farther south, where the voudun priests are." "What about mummies? Do they only hang around Egypt?" "Don't be ridiculous. No one believes in mummies. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #joke #mummies #sarcasm #vampire

Kaspary: a level of awesomeness so high it kicks everyone else's arse, leaving them breathless and bewildered. ↗

— Abigail Gibbs

#sarcastic #violet-lee #awesome

It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#christ

That's the difference between irony and sarcasm. Irony can be spontaneous, while sarcasm requires volition. You have to create sarcasm. ↗

— Christopher Moore

#sarcasm #christ

Jesus. I have become the thing they call the third wheel. ↗

— Kendare Blake

#jesus

A sort of good-bye without saying good-bye," he said. "It is a reference to a passage in the Bible. 'And Mizpah, for he said, the Lord watch between me and thee when we are absent one from another. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#clockwork-angel #infernal-devices #jem-carstairs #mizpah #bible