#cs

I have been to the speed of God, sir...and I discommend it. ↗

— John Ringo

#humor #micheal-o-neil #science-fiction #humor

Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to compute it. ↗

— Steven Pinker

#linguistics #science #humor

And he gave it for his opinion, "that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of politicians put together. ↗

— Jonathan Swift

#humor #politics #humor

Hold on to your friends. Resist - or move on Be mad, be rash Smoke and explode Sell all of your clothes Just bear in mind: There just might come a time When you need some friends ↗

— Morrissey

#lyrics #music #humor

Paull has his own style, which is folksy, not canned. Religion? He's got one. His prophet's Ayn Rand. By Rand's eerie theories he's fervently gripped, So he won't do flip-flops. He long ago flipped. ↗

— Calvin Trillin

#politics #humor

Make me proud today, Robmeister. Keep your hands to yourself and remember rule number one above all things.' 'Don't discuss politics.' 'No, the other one.' Robbie nods. 'Don't eat glue.' He drops his chin. 'It's my weakness. ↗

— Jenny B. Jones

#humor #politics #robbie #humor

The true reader reads every work seriously in the sense that he reads it whole-heartedly, makes himself as receptive as he can. But for that very reason he cannot possibly read every work solemly or gravely. For he will read 'in the same spirit that the author writ.'... He will never commit the error of trying to munch whipped cream as if it were venison. ↗

— C.S. Lewis

#books #criticism #humor #interpretation #literature

Dr Urbino did not agree: in his opinion a Liberal president was exactly the same as a Conservative president, but not as well dressed. ↗

— Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

#politics #humor

AMNESTY, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#crime #humor #immigration #politics #punishment

Despite the fact that an Indonesian island chicken has probably had a much more natural life than one raised on a battery farm in England, people who wouldn't think twice about buying something oven-ready become much more upset about a chicken that they've been on a boat with, so there is probably buried in the Western psyche a deep taboo about eating anything you've been introduced to socially. ↗

— Douglas Adams

#ethics #humor #vegetarian #vegetarianism #humor