#day

My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it. ↗

— Rodney Dangerfield

#always #day #did #eye #garbage

In my next life, I want to be tall and thin, parallel park and make good coffee. But for now, I have lots of stuff to work out in my life, but I'll have that until the day I die. I want to write more books. ↗

— Paula Danziger

#coffee #day #die #good #i

7 Mile is like an Ave. Back in the days it was poppin' in the summer time. ↗

— Obie Trice

#days #like #mile #summer #time

If you don't want to slip up tomorrow, speak the truth today. ↗

— Bruce Lee

#today

This ain't a football game, we do this every day. ↗

— Earl Weaver

#day #every #every day #football #football game

Today was a very cold and bitter day, as cold and bitter as a cup of hot chocolate, if the cup of hot chocolate had vinegar added to it and were placed in a refrigerator for several hours. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#today

I worked every day there, so I knew all the details. But I needed only some proof. So the proof was photos. ↗

— Mordechai Vanunu

#details #every #every day #i #knew

Grover murmured, "Well, Percy, what have we learned today?" That three-headed dogs prefer red rubber balls over sticks?" No," Grover told me. "We've learned that your plans really, really bite! ↗

— Rick Riordan

#lightning-thief #percy-jackson #today

My son's taking drum lessons, and my daughter's taking piano lessons. One day they're going to start a band. ↗

— Chris Daughtry

#daughter #day #drum #going #lessons

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then. ↗

— Larry David

#assume #back #combat #even #guard