#elf

Aren't fairy godmothers supposed to be nice and make you feel better about yourself? ...No, you're confusing fairy godmothers with sales clerks. ↗

— Janette Rallison

#humor #self-esteem #humor

I did not tell Fat this, but technically he had become a Buddha. It did not seem to me like a good idea to let him know. After all, if you are a Buddha you should be able to figure it out for yourself. ↗

— Philip K. Dick

#humor #self-awareness #spirituality #humor

Do everything that makes you happy"? Even if it means hurting somebody else? ↗

— Rea Erika Paraz Ebate

#humor #hurt #hurting #relationships #selfishness

From where I’m sitting, I AM the centre of the Universe! ↗

— Sebastyne Young

#narcissism #self-centered #humor

You can share in my joy, but I don’t want to share my misery. No, I want to give away my misery. Go ahead, take it all.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#humor #joy #miserable #misery #selfish

Self-doubt is a persuasive mistress; careful not to shag her or you’ll never get your balls back.” - Simon Hunt ↗

— Dannika Dark

#careful #dannika-dark #funny #humor #mageri

There's no room for demons when you're self-possessed. ↗

— Carrie Fisher

#self-deprecation #humor

Wie es scheint, schmilzt die Frühlingssonne den harten Eispanzer des Barbarenhäuptlings, und, o Wunder, darunter kommt ein Philisoph zum Vorschein." "Ich weiß nicht was Vielosoof für eine Beleidigung ist, aber du kannst dir sicher sein, dass der Barbarenhäuptling dir gleich die Axt in den Rachen schiebt!" Ollowain schlang die Arme übereinander und tat, als zittere er. "So plötzlich kehrt der Winter zurück und lässt die schönsten Frühlingsblüten erfrieren." "Hast du mich gerade etwa mit Blüten verglichen?", grollte Mandred. "Nur eine Allegorie, mein Freund." Der Menschensohn runzelte die Stirn. Dann nickte er. "Ich nehme deine Entschuldigung an, Ollowain." Nuramon musste sich auf die Unterlippe beißen, um nicht laut loszulachen. ↗

— Bernhard Hennen

#hennen #humor #mandred #nuramon #ollowain

Thank you very Much, I enjoyed myself ↗

— Richard P. Feynman

#self-esteem #self-inspired #humor

Self-esteem is for sissies. Accept that you're a pimple and try to keep a lively sense of humor about it. That way lies grace - and maybe even glory. ↗

— Tom Robbins

#humor