#fiction

Luis is right there.” I point to the corner of the yard, where my little brother is the centre of attention doing imitations of barnyard animals. I have yet to inform him that talent isn’t as much of a chick magnet when you get into junior high. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

Ben walks in the room and asks, “What were you guys doing?” Nikki says “Nothing” at the same time I say, “Your sister and I were just makin’ out. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

What’s with all those tattoos? Makes you look like a hooligan.” “I suspect I am a hooligan. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

Don’t try and make me feel better, Alex. I hate you.” “I hate you, too. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

A witch, a vampire, and a pixy walk into a bar, I thought as I led the way into the Squirrel’s End. It was early, and the sun had yet to set when the door swung shut behind Jenks, sealing us in the warm air smelling faintly of smoke. Immediately Nick yanked it open to come in behind us. And there’s the punch line. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor #rachel-morgan #romance #vampire #humor

Join us next time for Days of the Undead when Rachel learns her long lost brother is really a crown prince from outer space. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor #rachel-morgan #romance #vampire #humor

This college would probably have the same problem as the last one did." I frowned, "What's that?" "Homework. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#humor #rose #spirit-bound #vampire-academy #vampires

Riza: Without his Alchemy he's just... Jean: A little brat who swears a lot Maes: An arrogant pipsqueak Roy: Useless. Just useless Alphonse: Sorry big brother, I don't know how to add to that... Ed *starts to cry*: YOU'RE ALL PICKING ON ME!!! ↗

— Hiromu Arakawa

#alchemist #fiction #fullmetal #humor #science

Jenks enthusiastically leaned against the counter and opened the box. Bypassing the plastic knife, he broke off about a third of it and took a huge bite. Ivy watched, appalled, and I shrugged. His mouth moving as he hummed, Jenks finished unpacking the sacks. I was half dead, Ivy was whoring herself to keep me safe, but Jenks was okay as long as he had chocolate. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#humor #pixy #romance #supernatural #vampire

I had turned to leave and he had called after me. “Miss Maria, I kin no other woman who could be wearing men’s trousers and be dripping such as ye are and look quite so lovely. It’s a right shame your mother is marrying you off to that great sot!” I had turned to call back to him, “I doubt very much we will have to worry about that after today! ↗

— Gwenn Wright

#dark-romance #historical-fiction #scotland #scotsman #scottish