#football

By the way, you won't put that thing in about me wanting to have sex on a football pitch, will you? ↗

— Louise Nurding

#football #me #pitch #put #sex

I'm a minicamp body in 102-degree heat getting screamed at by the only other man my size: a middle-aged receivers coach they call Bow Wow. ↗

— Christopher Harris

#football #literary #age

I would definitely say the Oakland Raiders are the punk rock band of football. ↗

— Billie Joe Armstrong

#definitely #football #i #oakland #punk

The club is not a business. It's a populist democracy. ↗

— Simon Kuper

#economy #football-clubs #business

America has designated football as the international sport, but the rest of the world continues to apply the metric system inconsistently. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #humor #metric-system #sports #design

They've drunk everything in the house, including a pitcher of African violet plant food I'd just mixed up and was stupid enough to leave on the counter." Tremaine punched Eddie in the shoulder. "I told you it tasted weird." Eddie shrugged. "Tasted okay to me. ↗

— Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#humor #matchmaker #food

You're the only one that can put pressure on yourself... No one else can put pressure on you. It's self-inflicted. For me, I just want to go out and play football. ↗

— Maurice Jones-Drew

#football #inspiration #truth #inspirational

As you travel around medieval England you will come across a sport described by some contemporaries as 'abominable ... more common, undignified and worthless than any other game, rarely ending but with some loss, accident or disadvantage to the players themselves'. This is football. ↗

— Ian Mortimer

#history #medieval-life #sport #life

Anyone who's just driven 90 yards against huge men trying to kill them has earned the right to do Jazz hands. ↗

— Craig Ferguson

#dance #football #men

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? ↗

— Jim Bouton

#baseball #baseball players #field #football #football players