#her

A hero without faults is like an omelet without little bits of eggshell in it. ↗

— Colin Cotterill

#heroes #humor #personality #real-life #humor

S...For Stupendous! T...For Tiger, ferocity of! U...For Underwear, Red! P...For Power, Incredible! E...For excellent physique! N...For...Um...Something..Hm, well, I'll come back to that... D...For Determination! U...For...Wait, How do you spell this? Is it "I"?? ↗

— Bill Watterson

#super-heroes #humor

hermes has threatened me with slow mail. lousy Internet service and a horrible stock market if i publish this story. I hope he is just bluffing. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#heroes-of-olympus #humor #percabeth #percy-jackson #rick-riordan

[Yankees] are pretty much like southerners except with worse manners, of course, and terrible accents. ↗

— Margaret Mitchell

#rhett-butler-to-scarlett #southerners #yankees #humor

...there is the sheer emotional, intellectual, physical, chemical pleasure of your children. The honest truth is that the world holds no greater gratification than lying in bed with your children, putting your leg on top of them in a semi-crushing manner, while saying sternly, "You are a poo. ↗

— Caitlin Moran

#motherhood #humor

Trains are great dirty smoky things," said Will. "You won't like it." Tessa was unmoved. "I won't know if I like it until I try it, will I?" "I've never swam naked in the Thames, but I know I wouldn't like it. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#tessa-gray #will-herondale #humor

You either trust me or you don't. I've never let you down, and I won't walk away unless you make me. Period. Now, unless you have a real emergency, I'd like to get back to my vacation. And my corpse, thanks. ↗

— Jeaniene Frost

#cat-crawfield #catherine-crawfield #funny #humor #jeaniene-frost

Mr. Rochester never courted Jane Eyre," Tessa pointed out. "No, he dressed up as a woman and terrified the poor girl out of her wits. Is that what you want?" "You would make a very ugly woman." "I would not. I would be stunning. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jane-eyre #tessa-gray #william-herondale #humor

In his old life, the answer would have been easy: He'd have just put a gun to Vin's head and dragged the fucker to the altar. Now? He needed to be a little more civilized. ↗

— J.R. Ward

#jim-heron #marriage #vin #humor

It was nice to hear the voices of little children at play, provided you took care to be far enough away not to hear what they were actually saying. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#hogfather #humor #terry-pratchett #humor