#hum

Occasionally the poster pictures a pair of cyclists; and then one grasps the fact how much superior for purposes of flirtation is the modern bicycle to the old-fashioned parlour or the played-out garden gate. He and she mount their bicycles, being careful, of course, that such are of the right make. After that they have nothing to think about but the old sweet tale. Down shady lanes, through busy towns on market days, merrily roll the wheels of the “Bermondsey Company’s Bottom Bracket Britain’s Best,” or of the “Camberwell Company’s Jointless Eureka.” They need no pedalling; they require no guiding. Give them their heads, and tell them what time you want to get home, and that is all they ask. While Edwin leans from his saddle to whisper the dear old nothings in Angelina’s ear, while Angelina’s face, to hide its blushes, is turned towards the horizon at the back, the magic bicycles pursue their even course. ↗

— Jerome K. Jerome

#bicycling #humor #business

Religious fasting is the best way to cure an anorexic's spirit: in heaven her condition will be normal. ↗

— Bauvard

#fasting #funny #humor #funny

Right," Sadie said. "And Set will just stand there calmly while I read him to death. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#humor #death

Nonsense! I have merely come to terms with the fact that I am perfect, and I have decided life must go on, and I must learn to live with myself... ↗

— C.N. Faust

#fantasy #faust #gay #horror #humor

Human beings are so made that the ones who do the crushing feel nothing; it is the person crushed who feels what is happening. Unless one has placed oneself on the side of the oppressed, to feel with them, one cannot understand. ↗

— Simone Weil

#cannot #crushed #crushing #feel #feels

I saw this beautiful girl the other day. She had an ass behind her that seemed to go on for days. In fact, I’m still going on about her. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#beautiful-girl #funny #guy #humor #jerk

The art of medicine consists of keeping the patient in a good mood while nature does the healing. ↗

— Voltaire

#humor #art

So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. ↗

— George Carlin

#family #fun #hell #humor #death

The American experience influenced my understanding of individuality, basic human rights, freedom of expression and the rights and responsibilities of citizens. ↗

— Ai Weiwei

#american experience #basic #basic human rights #citizens #experience

Carpe Diem, just remember that we're partying on the Titanic. ↗

— Will McIntosh

#humor #sarcastic #funny