#humor

Je ne give a damn pas about le français, Les filles en France ne wear pas les pantelons ↗

— John Knowles

#humor

Affectations can be dangerous. ↗

— Gertrude Stein

#humor

I picture my epitaph: 'Here lies Paul Newman, who died a failure because his eyes turned brown. ↗

— Paul Newman

#humor

I had Eondel teach me," Raoden said. "Back when I was trying to find ways to prove that my father's laws were foolish. Eondel chose fencing becausehe thought it would be most useful to me, as a politician. I never figured I'd end up using it to keep my wife from slicing me to pieces. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#humor

I’ll be real discreet,” Tank said. As discreet as a six-foot-six, no-neck guy weighing three hundred and fifty pounds, all dressed in black SWAT clothes, with a Glock holstered at his side could be. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#humor

And Nedley started saying,'Shut Up!Quit that! And i knew it really meant something to him. So I asked for his help,"Mark said. "Don't tell the story like that," Nedley laughed. "What he said was 'Quit pretendin you're a bad guy I need your help, and I need it now! ↗

— Margaret Peterson Haddix

#humor #humor

The cartoon me writes the books cartoon people read in the cartoon world, because they need things to read there too. ↗

— Neil Gaiman

#gaiman #humor #neil #humor

Galladon paused for a moment, then laughed. "Does nothing frighten you, sule?" "Actually, pretty much everything here does—I'm just good at ignoring the fact that I'm terrified. If I ever realize how scared I am, you'll probably find me trying to hide under those cobblestones over there. ↗

— Brandon Sanderson

#humor

Fate has a twisted sense of humor. ↗

— Amelia Atwater-Rhodes

#humor #ironic #humor

Never underestimate the allure of the Goodwill. ↗

— Stacey Jay

#humor #shopping #humor