#humor

I'll see she gets them," Brodick said. Judith shook her head. "I want to meet her," she explained. She stood up and walked over to the table. "I have messages to give her from her mother." "I'll be happy to show you the way," Alex volunteered. "I'll do it," Gowrie announced in a much firmer voice. Brodick shook his head. "Isabelle is my sister-in-law," he snapped. "I'll show Judith the way." Iain had opened the door, and stood there listening to the argument. He was having difficulty believing what he was hearing… and seeing. His warriors were acting like lovesick squires while they argued over who would escort Judith. ↗

— Julie Garwood

#lovesickness #humor

Yeah, I write Urban Fantasy, but its more like Die Hard or Indiana Jones with Fairies, Mummies and a Vampire who uses guns more than his teeth. ↗

— Kevin James Breaux

#humor #urban-fantasy #humor

Talking to you is like -- like talking to an eel!" "No, is it? I've never tried to talk to an eel. Isn't it as waste of time?" "Not such a waste of time as talking to you! ↗

— Georgette Heyer

#humor

The verse is supposed to get you hard so the chorus can suck you off. ↗

— M. Thomas Gammarino

#humor #metaphor #music #humor

Is everyone from your planet like you?" Leyon asked, his gaze intent. "For the most part," she replied. "You have no men on your planet." "We do! ↗

— Lizzy Ford

#humor

Elsa's joke Where do baby apes sleep? In apricots! ↗

— Jacqueline Wilson

#humor

The problem with the Tea Party is they're all ignorant hillbillies who drink moonshine and ride around on mules. And they believe in stereotypes too. ↗

— Jon Stewart

#politics-of-the-united-states #humor

Angels and demons, vampires and lycans, all set against an inventive, intriguing story world that hooked me from the first page. Balancing action and romance, humor and hot sensuality, Sylvia Day's storytelling dazzles. I can’t wait to read more about this league of sexy, dangerous guardian angels and the fascinating world they inhabit. A Touch of Crimson is a paranormal romance lover's feast! ↗

— Lara Adrian

#endorsement #humor

You're his lobster. Or swan, Or penguin. The Spock to his Kirk ↗

— Elizabeth Rudnick

#love #humor

He caught me stealing his golden phoenix.' Tithonus closed his eyes briefly. 'Good grief!' He opened them again. 'I was half hoping it wasn't true. Have you any idea of the implications?' 'He was mistreating it!' Pyrgus protested. 'Of course he was mistreating it. This is Black Hairstreak we're talking about. He mistreats his own mother. I don't suppose you stole her as well? ↗

— Herbie Brennan

#phoenix #pyrgus #tithonus #humor