#humor

It should be noted that no ethically -trained software engineer would ever consent to write a DestroyBaghdad procedure. Basic professional ethics would instead require him to write a DestroyCity procedure, to which Baghdad could be given as a parameter. ↗

— Nathaniel S. Borenstein

#programming #software #humor

Who are they?” I whispered, as we took seats opposite each other. Scout glanced up as she pulled notebooks and books from her bag. “The dragon ladies. They monitor lights-out, watch us while we study, and generally make sure that nothing fun occurs on their watch.” “Awesome,” I said, flipping open my trig book. “I’m a fun hater myself. ↗

— Chloe Neill

#humor #humor

What are you, Zen Master Fang? ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#sookie #humor

Revenge is a dish best served published! ↗

— Lisa Kovanda

#revenge #writing #humor

A census taker once tried to test me. I let my front garden eat him. ↗

— Jonathan L. Howard

#humor

What you don't know may not hurt you, but what you don't remember always does. ↗

— Gerald M. Weinberg

#philosphical #humor

Speak, or I will put a dint in your hat that even a wizard will find hard to deal with! ↗

— J.R.R. Tolkien

#humor #lord-of-the-rings #humor

...as nervous as a bird in a coal mine. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#humor

He touched me. We kissed and we held hands sometimes. It was proper. Do you think I should have been with him in that way?" "Hell, no. He's probably not capable." "He's married now. They have children." "Must be Catholic." "What makes you say that?" "Virgin births. ↗

— Ellen O'Connell

#humor

Tonights is the first football game of the season West Paragon Dawgs versus East Paragon Dolphins - Cerberus guardiam of the underworld versus Flipper - go figure. ↗

— Addison Moore

#humor