#humor

A king who’s innocent of the things of which he’s guilty? ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#humor #king #humor

I was in the shopping mall because that's where I go lately. For the last couple of weeks, I've been going there every day, trying to figure out why people go there. It's kind of a personal project. ↗

— Stephen Chbosky

#humor

This guy had more lines than loose-leaf. ↗

— Cara Lynn Shultz

#humor

I've been stabbed before. Barely a week ago, in fact. AND I've been audited, AND I come from a broken home. In short - no offense, shorty - you don't scare me. ↗

— MaryJanice Davidson

#humor

You'd better put sunblock on that skeleton head of yours. You're gonna fry." -Bobby ↗

— D.J. MacHale

#humor

Sometimes you dont even want to think aout what people are doing with their groceries. ↗

— Sarah Dessen

#humor

I don't want any part of this. The whole thing kinda freaked me out. I'm sure girls always do what you tell them because you're hot, Brent, but I'm just not that interested." His head perked up with a wide smiled. "You think I'm hot? ↗

— Lani Woodland

#humor

that if you don't read nobody does ↗

— Jeff Kinney

#humor

I'd blurted out the question only to keep him from noticing that I was working my hands free, but the Warden behind me, some young brown-haired surfer dude, yelled a warning. "She's getting loose!" Narc. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor

I wrestled futilely, then relaxed as a vine wrapped three times around my throat and squeezed. Right," I choked out, and shut my eyes. "I'll wait here, then. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#rachel-caine #thin-air #humor