#ken

Have you ever had a girlfriend, Kenji?" "What?" He looks mortally offended. "Do I LOOK like the kind of guy who's never had a girlfriend? Have you even MET me? ↗

— Tahereh Mafi

#kenji #humor

It was then that my gaze happened to fall on the bookcase, on the gap there, where the old paperback of "Nine Stories" had fallen flat. "Where's the thing?" I said. "What thing?" "The mesh. My mesh." She shrugged. "I tossed it." "Tossed it? Where? What do you mean?" In the next moment I was in the kitchen, flipping open the lid of the trash can, only to find it empty. "You mean outside?" I shouted. "In the dumpster?" When I came thundering back into the room, she still hadn't moved. "Jesus, what were you thinking? That was mine. I wanted that. I wanted to keep it." Her lips barely moved. "It was dirty. ↗

— T.C. Boyle

#dysfunctional-relationships #passive-aggression #shaming #home

The last excuse that I'll claim, I was a boy who loved a woman like a little girl. ↗

— Ron Pope

#couples #heartbroken #love #relationships #love

If in this lifetime, I wont get to have you, I'll make sure that if I meet you in my next life I wont have to think twice on saying that "I waited a lifetime to say I love you... ↗

— Anjali Banerjee

#life

Nothing reminds us of an awakening more than rain. ↗

— Dejan Stojanovic

#dejan-stojanovic #literature #literature-quotes #poetry #poetry-quotes

Christ-likeness cannot be self-efforted" ~R. Alan Woods [2007] ↗

— R. Alan Woods

#r-alan-woods #self-effort #r-alan-woods

Invisible guns, huh?" Kenji smirks. "That's cute. I don't think I ever went through that phase. ↗

— Tahereh Mafi

#kenji #humor

Mr Lorry asks the witness questions: Ever been kicked? Might have been. Frequently? No. Ever kicked down stairs? Decidedly not; once received a kick at the top of a staircase, and fell down stairs of his own accord. ↗

— Charles Dickens

#dickens #humor #lie #witness #humor

Love is like a big juicy steak. You bite into it, enjoy it, then regret the calories you gained, when you're standin on your scale the next morning. See,I don't eat steak. I'm a vegetarian. ↗

— Euphoria Godsent

#cold-hearted #cold-hearted-people #diva #euphoria-godsent #heart-breaker

Jocko likes salty, Jocko likes sweet, but never bring Jocko any hot sauce, like with jalapenos, because it makes Jocko squirt funny-smelling stuff out his ears. ↗

— Dean Koontz

#jocko #salty #sweet #funny