#lmao

You're on a road show with your penis, and trust me, I'm the last person who wants to get in your way. But I'm telling you, operation occupy-my-vagina is a no-go for the evening. ↗

— Addison Moore

#funny

My hands wrapped around his waist, traveling up the broad expanse of his back, mooth and hard, and... "Give it a rest, already," Tod snapped from somewhere behind his brother. "It already smells like sex in here, and you're both still dressed. You have no idea how messed up that is. ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#lmao #lol #nash #romance #tod

Sneak out." He shrugged, as if that should have been a no-brainer. But that was easy for him to say. He was dead. What else could they do to him, take away his birthday? ↗

— Rachel Vincent

#kaylee #lmao #lol #tod #lol

I need to stop saying LMAO because that is precisely what's happening; I wish I could rewind time by two decades, immortalize my derriere in wax, and then kiss it goodbye. ↗

— Donna Lynn Hope

#humor #lmao #age

Fuckin' wit a madman in a bad mood It's like fuckin' wit a mad dog that wasn't fed food ↗

— DMX

#food