#lt

Emma was doing something nice for Simon? Hell must be enjoying the snow day. ↗

— E.J. Stevens

#fiction #humorous #mystery #mystery-series #paranormal

How would you like to star in your very own commercial?" "I'd rather swim in battery acid. ↗

— Robin Benway

#humor #wait #young-adult-fiction #humor

Reality is shaped by the forces that destroy it. ↗

— D. Harlan Wilson

#fantasy #horror #humor #literary #postmodern

All I did was offer to kill your dog, and the next thing I know I’m being judged. ↗

— Tom Upton

#teen #young-adult #humor

Anyone that looked like that wouldn't need to tie up girls and imprison them in order to get them to marry him ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#tessa-gray #will-herondale #young-adult #humor

You know, my main goal in life is trying not to end up in a straightjacket. ↗

— Tom Upton

#young-adult #humor

You know what they call alternative medicine that's been proved to work? - Medicine. ↗

— Tim Minchin

#humor #pseudoscience #quackery #scepticism #humor

She looks at the swings, and I can see she’s imagining what they’d look like if the kids weren’t there. The guilt of this holds her down momentarily. It appears to be there constantly. Never far away, despite her love for them. I realize that nothing belongs to her anymore and she belongs to everything. ↗

— Markus Zusak

#life #love #imagination

In WASP families, if you don't get along with someone, you have as little to do with them as possible. In Jewish families, you move next door, to make them as miserable as possible. ↗

— Doreen Orion

#culture #culture-critique #family #family-drama #family-relationships

In any case, it's the cowardice of people like you who give dictators the chance to install themselves! ↗

— Marjane Satrapi

#memoir #young_adult #humor