#m

At least, you two have decent manners," says Effie as we're finishing the main course. "The pair last year ate everything with their hands like a couple of savages. It completely upset my digestion." ... My mother taught Prim and me to eat properly, so yes, I can handle a fork and knife. But I hate Effie Trinket's comment so much I make a point of eating the rest of my meal with my fingers. Then I wipe my hands on the tablecloth. This makes her purse her lips tightly together. ↗

— Suzanne Collins

#humor

You are going to hurl yourself into a windstorm so you can fly into a prison? Why don't you write that sentence down and read it? Then perhaps you would realize how insane you are. ↗

— Eion Colfer Airman

#humor #humor

Goodreads sports some of the social awkwardness of middle school. If you are looking for a friend, I promise no matter your background or book preferences I will be your friend. :) ↗

— Red Phoenix

#social-commentary #truths #humor

You're a fine fastidious young man, as proud as a lion, as gentle as a girl. You'd make a good catch for the devil. ↗

— Honoré de Balzac

#coolness #eloquence #humor #swagger #humor

My love disappeared, along with the evidence of her dead body.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#death #evidence #humor #love #murder

Raise a smile and lower stress ↗

— Benny Bellamacina

#life #philosophy #wisdom #humor

Do I look like a shallow Summer girl to you?' She tossed her silver hair, offended. 'I’m a Winter Court royal. I kill silly Summer flowerlets with frost when I yawn. ↗

— Vicki Keire

#seasons #supernaturals #humor

It felt like he’d been dragged through the nine circles of hell — by his testicles. ↗

— Kay Berrisford

#erotica #fantasy #humor #m-m-paranormal #m-m-romance

I gave up on cussing - I'd run out of words filthy enough - and just started praying. ↗

— Sarah Monette

#humor #pain #humor

Are you telling me you're cooking me dinner?- Regan Its the quickest way, without physical contact, to get a woman into bed. The kitchen through there? ↗

— Nora Roberts

#romance #humor