#mo

The venn diagram of boys who don’t like smart girls and boys you don’t wanna date is a circle. ↗

— John Green

#dating

I guess you're coming as my date now." Simon shoved the phone into his pocket. "I'm secure enough in my masculinity to accept that," said Jordan. "We better get you something nice to wear, though," he called as Simon headed back into his room. "I want you to look pretty. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jordan-kyle #simon-lewis #dating

I used to date the lead singer of The Cranberries, but she cheated on me. Turns out she had some turkey on the side. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cranberries #dating #funny #humor #music

Simon rolled his eyes. “It’s a good thing we know the person who’s dating Magnus Bane,” he said. “Otherwise, I get the feeling we’d all just lie around all the time wondering what the hell to do next. Or trying to raise the money to hire him by selling lemonade or something.” Alec looked merely irritated by this comment. “The only way you could raise enough money to hire Magnus by selling lemonade is if you put meth in it. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#magnus-bane #simon #dating

Better be," Eve said. She mock-bit at his finger. "I could totally date somebody else, you know." "And I could rent out your room." "And I could put your game console on eBay." "Hey," Shane protested. "Now you're just being mean. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#eve-rosser #michael-glass #morganville-vampires #dating

Twitter provides us with a wonderful platform to discuss/confront societal problems. We trend Justin Bieber instead. ↗

— Lauren Leto

#humor #trends #twitter #humor

Getting you a date to prom is so hard that the hypothetical idea itself is actually used to cut diamonds," I added. Radar tapped a locker twice with his fist to show his approval, and then came back with another. "Ben, getting you a date to prom is so hard that the American government believes the problem cannot be solved with diplomacy, but will instead require force. ↗

— John Green

#dating #high-school #humor #john-green #paper-towns

Patience is a virtue and the best things in life are worth waiting for. ↗

— Julie Spira

#cyberdating #dating-advice #humor #julie-spira #online-dating

It took a long time, but I've finally figured it out. When it comes to men who are romantically interested in you, it's really simple. Just ignore everything they say and only pay attention to what they do. ↗

— Randy Pausch

#dating #humor #men-and-women #dating

GUESS WHERE I AM. CLUE? she texted back SWEAR U WON'T TELL A SOUL? U HAVE 2 ASK? I reluctantly texted,@ DINNER W. MARCIE'S DAD. #?@#$?!& MY MOM IS DATING HIM. TRAITOR! IF THEY GET MARRIED, U & MARCIE... COULD USE A LITTLE CONSOLATION HERE! DOES HE KNOW UR TEXTING ME? Vee asked. NO. THEY R INSIDE. I'M IN THE PARKING LOT ----COOPERSMITHS. THE PIMP. 2 GOOD 4 APPLEBEE'S, I SEE. I'M GOING 2 ORDER THE MOST EXPENSIVE THIN ON THE MENU. IF ALL GOES WELL,HIM GOING TO THROW HANK'S DRINK IN HIS FACE 2. ~Nora & Vee ↗

— Becca Fitzpatrick

#dating