#mon

No, but as a vampire, I'm able to detect subtle shifts in emotional energy. ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#funny #jenna #sarcastic #funny

You didn't have to go to the fireworks with him. Or - or let him fondle you." "Fondle?" Raisa raised her eyebrows, "When did I mention fondling? ↗

— Cinda Williams Chima

#funny #raisa #funny

Love is wealth, and the wealthy get taxed heavily. The universe is God’s welfare system, and communion is like standing in line for food stamps. When I get to the front, I’m chugging the wine. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#humor #money #food

I doubt she likes the idea of seeing him put back in a cage.” “Maybe not,” he said. “But she knows that the Authority are the only people who might be able to help him.” “Or kill him,” I said. “That too. What is life without risk?” “Long?” Terric laughed, a sort of high whooping that made me—and Zayvion, much to my surprise—smile. Contagious. For all he had a serious exterior, Terric was the guy you’d want to sit next to at a funny movie, just to hear him laugh. ↗

— Devon Monk

#devon-monk #terric #zay #funny

Drug addicts are so funny that way. Just spinning around, lost in their own little world. Doing so much, accomplishing so little. How sad. ↗

— James St. James

#drugs #james-st-james #party-monster #funny

I wish I had only offered you a sovereign instead of ten pounds. Give me back nine pounds, Jane; I’ve a use for it.' 'And so have I, sir,' I returned, putting my hands and my purse behind me. 'I could not spare the money on any account.' 'Little niggard!' said he, 'refusing me a pecuniary request! Give me five pounds, Jane.' 'Not five shillings, sir; nor five pence.' 'Just let me look at the cash.' 'No, sir; you are not to be trusted. ↗

— Charlotte Brontë

#money #funny

I make money using my brains and lose money listening to my heart. But in the long run my books balance pretty well. ↗

— Kate Seredy

#books #brains #heart #i #listening

Money is a strange business. People who haven't got it aim it strongly. People who have are full of troubles. ↗

— Ayrton Senna

#aim #business #full #got #haven

There's definitely a world view among college students that appreciates the need to act in the international community. ↗

— Jeanne Shaheen

#among #appreciates #college #college students #community

Come on guys, you cant fight like this forever" "Actually," Simon said, raising his hand,"I can". Jace made a weird noise and I realized he was trying not to laugh-which by the way, wasn't working. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#jace-wayland #mortal-instruments #simon-lewis #humor