#om

A brick could be used as a bowling ball. With how bad I bowl, a rectangle ball couldn’t possibly hurt my score, because in bowling you can’t get a lower score than zero ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I was not dressed crazily - I was dressed as a horse. And for a very logical and sane reason. ↗

— Diane Messidoro

#horse #humour #random #funny

You were lookin’ at me like you wanted to kiss me.” I force a laugh. “Yeah, right,” I say sarcastically. “Nobody’s watchin’ if you want to, you know, try it. Not to brag, but I’m somewhat of an expert. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

Instead I sounded like a little girl on her first day of kindergarten. My name is Bee, and I like coloring and horsies. ↗

— Kate Avery Ellison

#funny

A brick could be used like a used car salesman uses people. I know, because I used to sell cars. Well, technically I got fired precisely because I didn’t sell any cars.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

If she kept wondering about how much of her life Bran engineered, she’d end up on a funny farm knitting caps for ducks. ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#anna-cornick #bran-cornick #fair-game #humor #marrok

TO:[email protected]: Something's wrong! The house is shaking! TO:[email protected]: Well can you turn down the volume on Star Trek:Voyager? I thought we were having an earthquake when the Enterprise hit Warp speed. Why did you let me sleep until nearly one? ↗

— Robert Bryndza

#email #funny #star-trek-warp-speed #funny

Morelli was wearing a blazer over a black knit shirt, He took a seat, and his jacket swung wide, exposing the gun at his hip. "Nice piece!" Grandma said. "What is it? Is that a forty-five?" "It's a nine- millimeter." "Don't suppose you'd let me see it," Grandma said. "I'd sure like to get the feel of a gun like that." "No!" said everyone in unison. "I shot a chicken once," Grandma explained to Morelli. "It was an accident." "Where did you shoot it?" he finally asked. "In the gumpy," Grandma said. "Shot it clear off. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#funny

Luis is right there.” I point to the corner of the yard, where my little brother is the centre of attention doing imitations of barnyard animals. I have yet to inform him that talent isn’t as much of a chick magnet when you get into junior high. ↗

— Simone Elkeles

#humour #romance #young-adult-fiction #young-adult-romance #funny

A brick is a biographical film in which a young orphan brick from the wrong side of the track grows up to be one of the most important bricks in all brick kind, as it is now quite literally the cornerstone of one of America’s greatest ballparks.(Fenway) ↗

— Nicole McKay

#baseball #brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses