#om

A brick is a biographical film in which a young orphan brick from the wrong side of the track grows up to be one of the most important bricks in all brick kind, as it is now quite literally the cornerstone of one of America’s greatest ballparks.(Fenway) ↗

— Nicole McKay

#baseball #brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses

A brick pressed over each ear may protect from loud noises like a jackhammer. For softer noises that are annoying, like snoring, I’d recommend covering your ears with a blanket. 
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I directed my first film. It’s about the economy and it’s called “Bend Over.” It’s an hour and a half of a single continuous shot of an ass, naked and bent over. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#economy #funny #humor #funny

Dear Fly, I love you. If you are a mouse I am cheese. If you are a cat I am a mouse. You are a fly, so I want to be shit. ↗

— Casey Scieszka

#humor #love #funny

It is a known fact that pain and pleasure are the two most basic elements of life. But the secret is to simplify that fact. ↗

— Bauvard

#humor #life #pain #pleasure #sadomasochism

I squinted one of my eyes at Daniel. “What are you doing?” he asked. “This is me, giving you the side eye.” I continued to squint. “Well, you look like you’re having a stroke ↗

— Hodkin Michelle

#the-look #the-unbecoming-of-mara-dyer #funny

I said alone!” He nodded in agreement. “Aye, you usually say that, and I still stay. It’s our way. ↗

— Kresley Cole

#humour #love #paranormal-romance #romance #funny

Neighbors are the most indecent sort of folk around. Nothing but voyeurs and gossipers. As a community we would be much better off without them. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #gossiping #humor #neighbors #voyeurism

Warren made a noise, the first one I'd heard out of him since we'd come into the room. I'd have been happier if he hadn't sounded scared. "Easy, Warren," Adam told him. "You're safe here.” "If you die on us, you won't be," said Kyle with a growl that would have done credit to any of the werewolves in the room. ↗

— Patricia Briggs

#funny #mercy-thompson #friendship

A brick could be used to enslave humanity. No wait, a brick can’t do that—but the Masons can.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny