#on

He die one day, and then he go above of my head to live with your father." He weared the long hair, and after he died, the first day he come back here for to say hello to the peoples." He nice, the Jesus. ↗

— David Sedaris

#religion #humor

Money is the root of all evil.' Then we hear, 'A fool and his money are soon parted.' What are they talking about? If money is so evil, shouldn't it be, 'A wise man and his money are soon parted'? And another thing, how does a fool get money in the first place? I know some fools who have a lot of money, but they won't tell me how they got it, and I won't tell them. ↗

— George Burns

#fool #humor #money #sayings #wisdom

Bad pony-men! BOO! ↗

— Rick Riordan

#cyclopes #cyclops #heroes-of-olympus #humor #percy-jackson-and-the-olympians

Hello, cell. How are you? Still dank and dirty? Me? I've taken up a new habit: talking to my cell. It's like talking to myself but slightly more pathetic. ↗

— Brandon Mull

#humor #seth-sorenson #humor

Every human activity can be put at the service of the divine and of love. We should all exercise our gift to build community. ↗

— Jean Vanier

#community #love #love

If you hear a "prominent" economist using the word 'equilibrium,' or 'normal distribution,' do not argue with him; just ignore him, or try to put a rat down his shirt. ↗

— Nassim Nicholas Taleb

#humor #randomness #humor

Monty Python: A documentary series on everyday life in Great Britain. ↗

— Frank Portman

#monty-python #humor

I'll probably never fully become what I wanted to be when I grew up, but that's probably because I wanted to be a ninja princess. ↗

— Cassandra Duffy

#humor

Everyone, in some small sacred sanctuary of the self, is nuts. ↗

— Leo Rosten

#inspirational #life #humor

There will be days that you don’t want to dress up and if you have some decent looking athletic wear, you can give the illusion that you’ve just been working out, as opposed to giving up on life. ↗

— Big Mama

#humor #thebigmamablog #humor