#or

She had hit rock-bottom. She had given a blow job to a man who for all intents and purposes, was a bum. He had smelled so bad, she forced him to spray on some of the perfume she always carried in her purse. Her favorite perfume. After tonight, she was quitting. Yeah, she’d have to go back home with her two kids, grovel to her mama and work a dead-end job, but anything was better than getting down on your knees to give a guy as disgusting as Lenny a one-off. ↗

— A.T. Hicks

#humor #irony #prostitute #strip-club #home

Why do you need that thing?" September asked. "None of the airports back home have them." "They do. You just can't see them right," Betsy Basilstalk said with a grin. "All customs agents have them, otherwise, why would people agree to stand in line and be peered at and inspected? We all live inside the terrible engine of authority, and it grinds and shrieks and burns so that no one will say, lines on maps are silly. Where you live, the awful machinery is smaller, harder to see. Less honest, that's all. Whereas Rupert here? He's as honest as they come. Does what it says on the box. ↗

— Catherynne M. Valente

#customs #obedience #travel #truth-telling #home

Sometimes memory is the only gift we give ourselves and the only hope we have of finding our way home. ↗

— Harley King

#home #hope #memory #home

Shall we all open our heart to be a forever home for lost pets. ↗

— Martha Steward

#animal-stories #pet-adoption #home

Come on, it is a guest bedroom! If you want your guests to feel at home, they should be allowed to do whatever they do at home! ↗

— Daniele Lanzarotta

#imprinted-souls-series #nicholas #shattered-souls #vampires #home

Finally- no more ruddy show for the folks back home. No pretending it's all beer and skittles and no one ever gets hurt.- Phoenix and Ashes ↗

— Mercedes Lacky

#sad #thoughts-on-war #home

A brick could be used to decorate a house. And not just one brick, thousands could be stacked and affixed together and really make your house not only feel like a home, but less drafty too.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

[Tony] Pérez stood out because he was a clutch hitter. And like Bench and Morgan and Rose, it was a clutch October hit that immortalized him in baseball’s postseason lore. The powerful first baseman hit three home runs against Boston during the 1975 World Series, but none bigger than his blast against Bill Lee. ↗

— Tucker Elliot

#cincinnati-reds #tony-perez #home

I swim with all my strength. No superhuman surge, or pony heroics; it's just me at my most desperate. ↗

— Karen Russell

#karen-russell #home

But then again, I was pretty certain I'd make more mistakes, so I didn't dwell on the one I'd just made too long. This is another thing I'll put in my arsonist's guide: if you make a mistake, don't dwell on it too long, because you'll make more of them. ↗

— Brock Clarke

#home