#our

On the way home, I saw a fist fight between an adverb and a pair of parentheses. I kept on walking. ↗

— Peter James West

#inspirational #writing #writing-life #home

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe. ↗

— Albert Einstein

#human-nature #humor #infinity #philosophy #science

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. ↗

— Orson Welles

#dinners #doctor #four #having #intimate

I like to have a martini, Two at the very most. After three I'm under the table, after four I'm under my host. ↗

— Dorothy Parker

#drunken-behaviour #humor #humor

Give your kids a bloody knife and fork and let me put some fresh food in front of them they can eat. ↗

— Jamie Oliver

#eat #food #fork #fresh #fresh food

Caw! Caw, Hartley, caw!" Chase narrowed his eyes again. "Sam?" I nodded. Then crossed to the window again and called down to Sam. "You can quit squawking. He caught me. ↗

— Gemma Halliday

#humour #humor

Sorry. i just can't seem to help myself. My brain is freaking out. Two predawn mornings in a row. It doesn't know what to think, how to act. I'll have a talk with it later. Perhaps get it some counseling. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#humour #humor

We are like chameleons, we take our hue and the color of our moral character, from those who are around us. ↗

— John Locke

#character #color #hue #like #moral

Actually,I am a failed anorexic. I have anorexic thinking, but I can't seem to muster the behavoir ↗

— Carrie Fisher

#humour #humor

If you get yourself killed, I'll find your grave and spit on it," she threatened. ↗

— Julie Garwood

#humor #julie-garwood #romance #humor