#owe

I'm going to take a shower," I said and prepared for the comment I knew was coming. "You know what they say, conserve water and shower with a friend. ↗

— Chelsea M. Cameron

#funny #hunter-zaccadelli #my-favorite-mistake #shower #taylor-and-hunter

You said you'd give me half an hour!' 'And you said you'd satisfy me whenever I wanted it. I want it now.' He removed is jacket. 'Drop the towel.' 'I-I never agreed to be naked! ↗

— Kresley Cole

#naked #towel #funny

Besides, what do I know about being a wife? There are much more important qualities to have than a docile disposition. ↗

— C.J. Redwine

#girl-power #funny

I'm a widower with three sons and seven grandchildren. One of my sons is my partner on the ranch. ↗

— Wilford Brimley

#i #partner #ranch #seven #sons

Willpower subverts passion. Bureaucracy subverts willpower. Idiocy subverts bureaucracy. ↗

— Bauvard

#desire #funny #humor #idiots #willpower

What we’ve got here is a lunatic genius ghost-in-the-computer monorail that likes riddles and goes faster than the speed of sound. Welcome to the fantasy version of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest. ↗

— Stephen King

#funny #humourous #funny

No sticky till I no longer feel icky, you feel me? ↗

— Ethan Day

#luke #owen #funny

It's probably a bit of a power trip when you befriend somebody enough that they trust you to tell you things. ↗

— Josh Brolin

#bit #enough #power #probably #somebody

Stand out from the crowd, be yourself. ↗

— Stephen Richards

#cosmic-ordering #law-of-attraction #mind-body-spirit #mind-power #money

Ye glow-worms, whose officious flame To wand’ring mowers shows the way, That in the night have lost their aim, And after foolish fires do stray; Your courteous lights in vain you waste, Since Juliana here is come, For she my mind hath so displac’d That I shall never find my home. ↗

— Andrew Marvell

#home