#p

A brick could be used to stop a bleeding wound. Though just between you and me, I’d prefer to be bandaged by a Band-Aid, a blanket, or a pair of lace panties (preferably red).
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A blanket isn’t the solution, a blanket is the problem. I say we burn all the blankets, along with the bodies of the unbelievers.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket #funny #humor #random #strange

The bottom half of the page had descended into a doodle of a tiny man giving the middle finger to a giant, angry eagle with razor-sharp talons. Beneath it, the caption: To Mock a Killing Bird. ↗

— Seth Grahame-Smith

#funny #vampire-hunter #funny

A princess always takes care that her words are honeyed, for she may have to eat them ↗

— Christina Dodd

#funny #princesses #funny

One brick is not a wall. Unless you’re an ant, and then it’s not only a wall, it’s a building—a building that has no doors, windows, or people in the form of managers that I’d like to smash in the face with a building (or a brick).
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A blanket could be used to suppress yawns. Just curl up in the technological wonder that is a blanket, lay your head back, and let the miracle of science cure your yawns.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

You're a big boy, No. You'll figure something out. Just make sure it includes the groveling." -Abby It come to all of us. Especially those of us foolish enough to fall in love with women who have minds of their own. If you will recall, your own sister had a few things she had to forgive me for before we could move on with our relationship." -Rule There's a big difference between a little kidnapping and what he did." -Abby "You did not call it a 'little' anything at the time, sweet. You were furious with me. Believe me, the groveling does do wonders." -Rule ↗

— Christine Warren

#realtionship-problems #forgiveness

One blanket, coupled with a fluffy pillow, could be implemented as a torture device for insomniacs.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick is what I’m voting for for President. And guess what? If you’re voting for a Republican or Democrat, so are you.
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— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Maybe the truly handicapped people are the ones that don't need God as much. ↗

— Joni Eareckson Tada

#independence #pride #weaknesses #love