#ran

A brick can be neither good nor bad. A brick just is. And it isn’t, because I just stole it from you, which is good for me, and bad for you.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used as a stand in for a liar’s face. Go on, punch that liar in his face. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be used in place of a diamond on a wedding ring. Your wife's probably going to divorce you and take the house anyway, so you might as well give her the first brick.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

A brick could be pet, like a dog, and taught to shit in my neighbor's yard.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Brick and Blanket could be the names of two characters in a screenplay full of witty dialogue like:
 Brick: Hello!
 Blanket: Hi!
 Brick: How are you?
 Blanket: Good. You?
 Brick: Good. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

I’d seen weirder things than a haunted shoe, but not many. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#haunted-shoe #humor #paranormal-romance #random #richelle-mead

You should have seen the costumes for the last few prom themes: Pimps and their srteet ho's; CEOs and their office ho's; GI Joes and their combat ho's; Gardeners and their garden hose;Firemen and their fire hose... If you ask me, a 'masquerade' theme isn't flattering for anyones features, nor does it define the apppropriate gender roles very clearly. ↗

— The Harvard Lampoon

#funny #ho-s #nightlight #random #funny

Val had a horrific image of Lisa peering through a magnifying glass like a grotesquely teenybopper version of Nancy Drew — in jeggings. ↗

— Nenia Campbell

#funny-and-random #humor #funny

When Johnny Depp saw it, he was so excited he fluffed up to twice his normal size. ↗

— Diane Messidoro

#funny #humour #random #funny

He who destroys a good book, kills reason itself. ↗

— John Milton

#honesty #john-milton #random #reason #truth