#ran

Wonderful," Garan grumbled when he'd gone. "We'll grow a reputation for our kindness to lawbreakers. ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#humor #humor

I remembered my little brother, Allyn, had appeared so innocent and angelic when he slept--similar to Kerrick. It must be a survival tactic. If Allyn hadn't looked so sweet, we would have killed him while he slept. He had been pure evil when he was awake--similar to Kerrick. ↗

— Maria V. Snyder

#appearances #brothers #humor #innocence #sleep

Oh, no-" They weren't even on the runway, and Jonah's father was already immersed in his BlackBerry. "Remember those 'Live Large with the Wiz Generation' posters? Well, guess how that translates into Chinese- 'Jonah Wizard Makes Your Ancestors Fat'. ↗

— Gordon Korman

#joke #jonah-wizard #mistake #translation #humor

Hand me my pants, ↗

— Michael Grant

#random #humor

Burn you, Nerim, that's a leg not a bloody side of beef!' 'As my lord says,' Nerim murmured. 'My lord's leg is not a side of beef. Thank you, my lord, for instructing me. ↗

— Robert Jordan

#humor #jordan #mat #nerim #rand

The Lone Ranger of vampires. Did that make me Tonto? ↗

— Robin McKinley

#lone-ranger #vampires #humor

Go fuck yourself," I replied, always the lady. "I'm staying here. ↗

— Ava Gardner

#fighting #frank-sinatra #humor #humor

We are not going to change the whole world, but we can change ourselves and feel free as birds. We can be serene even in the midst of calamities and, by our serenity, make others more tranquil. Serenity is contagious. If we smile at someone, he or she will smile back. And a smile costs nothing. We should plague everyone with joy. If we are to die in a minute, why not die happily, laughing? (136-137) ↗

— Swami Satchidananda

#death #freedom #happiness #joy #laughter

I hit him on the back of the neck. He submerged. Help. I've drowned the Beast Lord. ↗

— Ilona Andrews

#drowning #humor #ilona-andrews #kate #magic-strikes

Hey!" I turned, crossing my arms and glaring. "I was talking to him!" Tybalt eyed me with amusement, which just made me glare harder. "No, you were inciting him to stab you with a toothpick. Again, the difference is small, but I think it matters. ↗

— Seanan McGuire

#humor #san-francisco #humor