#range

Somebody left a pair of baby shoes on a bench. I would have taken them home, if only they weren’t too big for my feet.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#baby-shoes #bench #bizarre #feet #funny

Bricks could be used to stock vending machines. You may be out of a home, but I’ll never be out of bricks to sell you.
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Babe! ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#ranger #humor

Babe," Ranger said. "You're looking a little strung out. Is there anything I should know?" I'm on a sugar withdrawal. I've given up desert and it's all I can think about." That had been true five minutes ago. Now that Ranger was standng in front of me I was thinking a cupcake wasn't what I actually needed. Maybe I can help you get your mind off doughnuts," Ranger said. My mouth dropped open, and I think some drool might have dribbled out. ↗

— Janet Evanovich

#ranger #romance #stephanie #humor

What is this Chocho business?' Will muttered to himself. But his friends overheard the comment. 'It's a term of great respect,' they chorused, and he glared at them. 'Oh, shut up,' he said. ↗

— John Flanagan

#ranger-s-apprentice #will #business

When I was 12 years old, I was hanging out with 23-year-olds. I was into cartoons and Pokemon, and they're all talking about girls. It was a strange way to grow up. ↗

— Shaun White

#cartoons #grow #grow up #hanging #i

Some people try to change the world one life at a time. Others try to change the world one death at a time. And I try to change the world one bucket full of dirt at a time. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#death #funny #hope #humor #life

Smile at strangers and you just might change a life. ↗

— Steve Maraboli

#compassion #inspirational #smile #strangers #change

There was me, that is Alex, and my three droogs, that is Pete, Georgie, and Dim, Dim being really dim, and we sat in the Korova Milkbar making up rassoodocks what to do with the evening, a flip dark chill winter bastard though dry. The Korova Milkbar was a milk-plus mesto, and you may, O my brothers, have forgotten what these mestos were like, things changing so skorry these days, and everybody very quick to forget, newspapers not being read much neither. ↗

— Anthony Burgess

#anthony-burgess #change

The 21st chapter gives the novel the quality of genuine fiction, an art founded on the principle that human beings change. ----- "A Clockwork Orange Resucked" intro to first full American version 1986 ↗

— Anthony Burgess

#american #intro #introduction #irony #philosophical