#rca

You're a big help, Mr. I Read So Many Books. ↗

— Laura Ruby

#sarcastic #humor

Phrase the question any way you like…The answer will still be ‘Kiss my ass. ↗

— M.A. George

#kiss-my-ass #paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #humor

Are you fighting evil tonight?...Then you are doing the Lord's work. Shut the fuck up. ↗

— James R. Tuck

#humor

Do you really think that God in his heaven with all the angels, there from the beginning of time and looking towards the day of judgement day, really looks down on all the world and see's you and little harry and says 'whatever you choose to do is my will?' "Yes i do." she says uncertainly. ↗

— Philippa Gregory

#ignorance #sarcasm-humor #humor

Thomas: Is it [my brain] fixed? Brenda: It worked, judging from the fact that you're not trying to kill us anymore... ↗

— James Dashner

#humor #maze-runner #mind-control #sarcasm #sci-fi

It's Thursday afternoon, and we have sports. These are the choices for the girls: watching an invitational cricket game; studying in one of the classrooms; or watching the senior rugby league. As you can imagine, I'm torn. ↗

— Melina Marchetta

#sports #imagination

Come on, there's no one there. You want coffee?" Tess asked. "Yeah, sure, why not? I'm only on the brink of a nervous breakdown. I don't imagine why caffeine wouldn't help this situation. ↗

— Frankie Rose

#sarcasm #humor

Here she is,” her mum said, cooing at the baby, “my special girl.” “Oh, cheers,” Valkyrie said, rolling her eyes. ↗

— Derek Landy

#sarcasm #special #death

Though he’d never know for sure what had happened to them, his mind was super talented at imagining the absolute worst. ↗

— James Dashner

#humor

I can only imagine what goes on in that head of yours…” he teased. “I assure you I haven’t taken up black magic, ritualistic sacrifice, or—” “Plushophilia?” I tagged on. “Excuse me?…” came his half-confused, half-intrigued reaction. “An obsession with stuffed animals,” I clarified. “I mean, you are a young one…” “Where did you come up with that?” He kept his hands firmly covering my eyes, but I could hear the amused smile in his voice. “Is that even a real word?” “I’m a doctor, I know these things,” I shrugged. ↗

— M.A. George

#paranormal-romance #sarcastic-humor #imagination