#sk

It's a good thing most people bleed on the inside or this would be a gory, blood-smeared earth. ↗

— Beatrice Sparks

#diary #drugs #go-ask-alice #heroin #marijuana

Brilliance is impossible without a touch of insanity. ↗

— Skyla Madi

#humor #inspirational #skyla-madi #truth #funny

It turns out, Holder doesn’t have an issue with Mormons at all. He just has an issue with assholes. ↗

— Colleen Hoover

#colleen-hoover #dean-holder #funny #hopeless #sky-and-holder

Aurora sagged. "Why is it," she asked, "that every time I'm with you two we end up stealing something big?" "We always return it," Donegan said, a little defensively. "Maybe not always in one piece or necessarily to the right person but return it we do, and so it is not stealing, it is merely borrowing." Gracious looked at him. "It's a little bit stealing." "Anyone who leaves a private jet just lying around deserves to have it stolen." "It wasn't lying around," said Gracious. "It was locked up tight. It took us an hour to dismantle the security system and get inside." Donegan looked at him. "You're not helping. ↗

— Derek Landy

#funny #gracious #leave #malifecent #plane

A good story should provoke discussion, debate, argument...and the occasional bar fight. ↗

— J. Michael Strazynski

#humor #j-michael-strazynski #story #writing #funny

I happen to find ceilings much lovelier than the night sky myself. Sometimes I just stare at them for hours and wonder what could be up there. ↗

— Bauvard

#ceilings #constellations #funny #humor #sky

And if I vas to point at a castle on a towering crag and say 'Yonder is...zer castle' a volf would be bound to howl mournfully. In zer old country, zer scenery is psychotropic and knows vot is expected of it. Here, alas, people just look at you in a funny vay. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#psychotropic #uberwald #vampire #funny

Blankets have been used by companies for years for enterprise risk management because it is much easier to cover up problems than it is to identify and fix them. ↗

— Amy Summers

#brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #business #enterprise-risk-management

Fuck You!' [Oskar said] 'Exuse me!' [His mom said] 'Sorry. I mean, screw you.' 'You need a time-out!' 'I need a mausoleum! ↗

— Jonathan Safran Foer

#jonathan-safran-foer #oskar-schell #sad #funny