#the

Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen. ↗

— Mort Sahl

#deserve #everything #feel #liberals #possessions

Holy hell weasel! ↗

— Rachel Hawkins

#what-the-hell #humor

Did you hear something?" "No." "Did I hear something?" "...I don't know... ↗

— Matt Groening

#humor #lenny #the-simpsons #humor

When it comes to death, we know that laughter and tears are pretty much the same thing. And so, laughing and crying, we said good-bye to my grandmother. And when we said goodbye to one grandmother, we said good-bye to all of them. Each funeral was a funeral for all of us. We lived and died together. All of us laughed when they lowered my grandmother into the ground. And all of us laughed when they covered her with dirt. And all of us laughed as we walked and drove and rode our way back to our lonely, lonely houses. ↗

— Sherman Alexie

#grandmothers #death

I wonder what all those Chinese poets sound like in Chinese. I like their distilled quality. ↗

— Tom Verlaine

#distilled #i #i wonder #like #poets

Of course, tax revenues have ended up being substantially higher than they were at the time these dire projections were made, and we are very close now to having a balanced budget. All that has been very helpful. ↗

— Charles Vest

#balanced budget #been #being #budget #close

All this twaddle, the existence of God, atheism, determinism, liberation, societies, death, etc., are pieces of a chess game called language, and they are amusing only if one does not preoccupy oneself with 'winning or losing this game of chess. ↗

— Marcel Duchamp

#chess #god #language #life #religion

We knew, finally, that the girls were really women in disguise, that they understood love and even death, and that our job was merely to create the noise that seemed to fascinate them. ↗

— Jeffrey Eugenides

#the-virgin-suicides #death

Still trying to save the world?” “Always,” I said, “and in case you haven’t noticed, it’s working. The world is still here. ↗

— Nicole Williams

#save-the-world #humor

That's your mom, right?" Pathik smiled. "She looks nicer than she did when she was dragging you away the other night. ↗

— Teri Hall

#mothers #pathik #teri-hall #the-line #humor