#weird

A brick could be put on the end of a scale, to determine if the other end of the scale holds a lie or the truth. (Hint: The truth is much heavier than a brick.)
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

My love for you would blot out the sun like a cloud made out of yogurt. I hope you brought a spoon. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#bizarre #blot-out #cloud #funny #humor

Well now," the scholar went on, "I'm just an old fuddy-duddy who could use a tan, so you needn't grant my opinion any authority, but I consider the queendom lucky that a handful of Milliners and their children lived incognito among the population during Redd's tyranny. ↗

— Frank Beddor

#frank #glass #humor #incognito #looking

A demonic reaper asked to be my valentine and then killed his crazy ex-girlfriend to save my life. Tomorrow I was starting up antipsychotic meds. ↗

— Courtney Allison Moulton

#ex-girlfriends #humor #life-saving #meds #reaper

We have truth in order not to die of art. ↗

— Steve Aylett

#humor #weird #art

A blanket could be considered part of performance art, if you’re inconsiderate and steal all the covers while we’re asleep—and film me shivering and twitching in the night. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#brick-and-blanket-iq-test #brick-and-blanket-responses #brick-and-blanket-test #brick-and-blanket-uses #funny

Hey, Ms. P," Tad called, "what's going on?" She let out a slow breath before she answered. "You won't believe this... Brian Murrey tried to eat Scott Morgan." Nick's eyes widened at the unexpected explanation. Had he heard that right? ↗

— Sherrilyn Kenyon

#nick #odd #strange #weird #zombies

My words fly up, my thoughts remain below: Words without thoughts never to heaven go. ↗

— William Shakespeare

#shakespeare

Some people are born with a brain that has this weird, magical mathematical thing that makes them an amazing jazz musician. ↗

— Andy Richter

#born #brain #jazz #jazz musician #magical

I have this problem with violence. I've only done one movie in almost 20 years where I killed people. It's called Perdita Durango. It's a Spanish movie. I'm very proud of the movie, but I felt weird doing that. ↗

— Javier Bardem

#called #doing #done #felt #i