#wtf

She spoke throught her teeth. "Almost, dear. What were the real words you used? The bad words. It's okay to say them again, just this once." I shrugged, "fine. I said'. . . just 'cause Daddy wants you to suck on his ding-a-ling. ↗

— Michael Siemsen

#father-humphrey #group-talk #lol #morgan #morgan-mother

Primarily, shapeshifters of the animal variety remain true to animal kingdom rules in their sexual behaviors. I cant say Ive ever seen two male shack up, set up housekeeping, and make crème brûlée together in their nest of love. ↗

— Dakota Cassidy

#love

The story of Yoshitsune and the Thousand Cherry Tres was both simple and complicated. Simple in that things never change: people consistently jealous or secretive or brave-hearted. As for the rest, it all came down to a series of misunderstandings, the type that could happen to anyone, really. You assume that the sushi bucket is full of gold coins, but instead it's got Kokingo's head in it. You think you know everything about your faithful follower, but it turns out that he's actually an orphaned fox who can change his shape at will. It was he who spoke my favorite line of the evening, five words that perfectly conveyed just how enchanting and full of surprises this Kabuki play really is: 'That drum is my father. ↗

— David Sedaris

#japanese-mythology #kabuki #plays #wtf #change

She could already feel small waves of her juices fall from her newly-broken pussy, making a damp spot under her ass. ↗

— Lola Newmar

#longhorn-shifters #not-sexy #omgwtfbbq #wtf #love

Phnglui mglw nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah nagl fhtagn ↗

— H.P. Lovecraft

#horror #wtf #fantasy

I ceased the search to listen again, what the problem was. What’s going on at home? Why was Luccas calling out Jane’s name? What happened? Why could I hear him without connecting directly to him? I shook my head, but screams pierced through. I moved the shelf on its side, a loud crashing that startled the men outside. Falling to my knees, I covered my ears to them. My head banged against the metal and stayed there. “What in the name of Hera am I going to do?” I asked the air. The screams stopped but for how long? How long would silence be until they resumed? I raised my head, gently pulling my hands away and listened. Silence. Where were the men chasing me? Did they give in and go home? No, that would have been too easy. Saain would slay each man for leaving a traitor alive. ↗

— Millicent Ashby

#home

All women love semi-rape. They love to be taken.It was his sweet brutality against my bruised body that made his act of love so piercingly wonderful. ↗

— Ian Fleming

#rape #sex #wtf #love

Oh yes! Smell how much I need you!" Taylor's hips bucked over and over, desperately searching for a part of their bodies to wet with her cream. ↗

— Lola Newmar

#not-sexy #two-hot-men #wtf #men

By reinforcing every part, he weakens every part. ↗

— Sun Tzu

#art