#ale

You send me all these roses. Every time I think the last bouquet has arrived, finally, another turns up. I’m running out of vases. I didn’t know roses came in so many colors. You say they’re the perfect symbols of love because they have thorns and love is pain. I say life is pain, highness. Anyone who says differently is selling something. And you don’t get it. You say you love me, but you don’t speak my language. You don’t even realize I’m an orchid girl. ↗

— Erin Morgenstern

#life

You're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater. ↗

— Joss Whedon

#malediction #humor

Basia coquum," Simon said. "Or whatever their motto is." "It's 'Descensus Averno facilis est.' 'The descent into hell is easy," said Alec. "You just said "Kiss the cook." "Dammit," said Simon. "I knew Jace was screwing with me. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #simon-lewis #humor

She wakes in a puddle of sunlight. Her hands asleep beside her. Her hair draped on the lawn like a mantle of cloth. ↗

— Roman Payne

#love #nymph #ode #pastoral #pastorale

I have a suggestion," said Valentine to Luke, in a surprisingly even tone. "Let me guess," said Luke. "It's 'Don't kill me,' isn't it? ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#humor #luke #valentine #humor

I love who you are, yesterday, now, tomorrow, always. ↗

— Gena Showalter

#tales-of-an-extraordinary-girl #twice-as-hot #love

I have a beard of fog that I wear on misty mornings. It’s not cigarette smoke, but I’d understand if you wanted to shave it off and inhale it. 
 ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#cigarette #fog #funny #humor #inhale

I have to return some videotapes ↗

— Bret Easton Ellis

#bale #bret #christian #easton #ellis

My first words, as I was being born [...] I looked up at my mother and said, 'that's the last time I'm going up one of those. ↗

— Stephen Fry

#female-genitalia #homosexuality #humor #mothers #humor

Míralo. El rostro de un ángel malicioso y los ojos como el cielo nocturno en el Infierno. Es muy hermoso, y a los vampiros les gusta eso. Y no puedo decir que a mí me moleste. -Magnus sonrió de medio lado-. Cabello negro y ojos azules son mi combinación favorita. ↗

— Cassandra Clare

#magnus-bane #tessa-gray #will-herondale #love