#ate

A brick could be used as a Love Detector. Yes, it's true! Find the love of your life today. Don't hesitate! To find out how, please mail a check or money order to:
 Jarod Kintz
 12321 Gullible Dr.
 Jacksonville, Fl 32202
 (Actual brick not included.) ↗

— Dark Jar Tin Zoo

#brick-and-blanket-test #divergence-test #funny #humor #love

You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life. ↗

— Emo Philips

#being #day #every #every day #get

They send a person who can never stay," she whispered. "Who can never accept my offer of companionship for more than a little while. They send me a hero I can't help ... just the sort of person I can't help falling in love with." ... As I sailed into the lake I realized the Fates really were cruel. They sent Calypso someone she couldn't help but love. But it worked both ways. For the rest of my life I would be thinking about her. She would always be my biggest what if. ↗

— Rick Riordan

#cruel #fates #love #percy-jackson #punishment

BABARIC! ↗

— Robert Byrd

#barbaric #dog-fighting #old-people #robert-byrd #u-s-senate

I had a friend who got pregnant at age 14 and wasn’t quite sure who the father was. Her paternity test went a little something like this: “If it comes out black, its Darwin’s and if it comes out white its Ray’s.” This is how things were done in the trailer park. ↗

— Kate Madison

#paternity-test #trailer-park #age

But if it not be true, the myth itself requires to be explained, and every principle of philosophy and common sense demand that the explanation be sought, not in arbitrary allegorical categories, but in the actual facts of ritual or religious custom to which the myth attaches. ↗

— William Robertson Smith

#allegorical #arbitrary #attaches #be true #categories

We gallop through our lives like circus performers balancing on two speeding side-by-side horses--one foot is on the horse called "fate," the other on the horse called "free will." And the question you have to ask every day is--which horse is which? Which horse do I need to stop worrying about because it's not under my control, and which do I need to steer with concentrated effort? ↗

— Elizabeth Gilbert

#free-will #life #life

Never open the door to a lesser evil, for other and greater ones invariably slink in after it. ↗

— Baltasar Gracian

#door #evil #greater #invariably #lesser

When words become unclear, I shall focus with photographs. When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence. ↗

— Ansel Adams

#content #focus #i #images #inadequate

I wish I had known more firsthand about the concerns and problems of American businesspeople while I was a U.S. senator and later a presidential nominee. That knowledge would have made me a better legislator and a more worthy aspirant to the White House. ↗

— George McGovern

#american #better #businesspeople #concerns #firsthand