#ate

Underwater, bubbles erupted before my eyes as a swift hand snatched my arm and pulled me to the surface. I gasped for air, coughing and gagging at the amount of water I sucked into my lungs by pure shock. What was up with me and breathing in water? I needed to grow some gills or something. ↗

— Laura Kreitzer

#fiction #funny #gills #humor #kreitzer

Sorry I'm late," Ms. Egami said to the class. She dropped her papers, which scattered in that special way papers do when one is running late. ↗

— Adam Rex

#late #papers #school #teacher #funny

The whole thing reminds me of graduate school seminars, except these people are smart and funny and have something interesting to say. ↗

— Sarah Vowell

#funny

When I was pregnant, I felt filled with life, and I felt really happy. I ate well, and I slept well. I felt much more useful than I'd ever felt before. ↗

— Suzanne Vega

#before #ever #felt #filled #happy

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people. ↗

— Orson Welles

#dinners #doctor #four #having #intimate

After a month or so in St. Louis, we were looking around desperately for a way to draw a few people into the ball park, it being perfectly clear by that time that the ball club wasn't going to do it unaided. ↗

— Bill Veeck

#around #ball #ball club #being #clear

The advice that I usually give to young actors is that if you can create a character for the stage and keep that character fresh for at least 6 months that means you're doing the show eight times a week. ↗

— Joe Morton

#character #create #doing #eight #fresh

The best way to be appreciative for your life is to live it; don't die for any other reason but love. Dreams are what guide us, art is what defines us, math is makes it all possible, and love is what lights our way. ↗

— Mike Norton

#appreciation #dark #death #die #dream

I would have hated to been locked into music for the last 20 years and not been able to have a family. ↗

— Jerry Only

#been #family #hated #i #into

Anybody who says they are a good liar obviously is not, because any legitimately savvy liar would always insist they're honest about everything. ↗

— Chuck Klosterman

#always #any #anybody #because #everything