#awkward

Uh... ," Ivy stammered, and I glanced up to see her eyes wide in consideration. "I'm kidding," I said. "It passed the lethal-amulet test, remember?" "Not that. You keep it in your underwear drawer?" I hesitated, wondering why I was embarrassed. "Well, where do you put your elven magic?" I asked. ↗

— Kim Harrison

#elven-charm #funny #ivy #rachel #funny

you're Shane, right?' He inched away from her and managed a quick nod as he twisted the rag he held in his fingers. 'Heidi sad you were willing to teach me how to ride.' Her expression shifted from entertained to confused, as if she was wondering why no one had mentioned he was a can or two shy of a six-pack. 'A horse,' he clarified, then wanted to kick himself. What else but a horse? Did he think she was here to learn to ride his mother's elephant? One corner of Annabelle's perfect, full mouth twitched. 'A horse would be good. You seem to have several.' He wanted to remind himself that he was usually fine around women. Smooth even. He was intelligent, funny and could, on occasion, be charming. Just not now, with his blood pumping and his brain doing nothing more than shouting "it's her, it's her" over and over again. Chemistry, he thought grimly. It could turn the smartest man into a drooling idiot. Here he was, proving the theory true. ↗

— Susan Mallery

#awkward-encounters #chemistry #shane #stupidity #funny

I got picked on a lot. I was a complete geek in school. I had braces. I didn't have the hot girlfriend. I wasn't ever sought after. I was a stocky, awkward kid who got laughed off the tennis court when I tried that. ↗

— Josh Brolin

#awkward #braces #complete #court #ever

When you go to take someone's picture, the first thing they say is, what you want me to do? Everyone is very awkward. ↗

— Annie Leibovitz

#everyone #first #first thing #go #me

Nolan has the strangest affect on people. You know, I think there's something very sad and little boy about him, but at the same time the way he goes about everything is so awkward and obnoxious. He can never say the right thing, you know? And I think if he just didn't try so hard and calmed down, people might actually like him a bit more! ↗

— Gabriel Mann

#actually #affect #awkward #bit #boy

The commentary track became a lot like the movie and there are some funny, long, awkward pauses that you can tell we're just trying to find stuff to say. None of us had gotten to really talk about the movie until that moment and they were in New York and we were in L.A. ↗

— Jay Roach

#awkward #became #commentary #find #funny

I love Charlie, Billy Burke's character. Writing for him is so spectacular, he's so funny and wry and every scene he's in he just takes. There's a scene in 'Eclipse' where Bella tells him she's a virgin, and it's the funniest, most awkward scene I've ever seen on film. ↗

— Melissa Rosenberg

#billy #character #charlie #eclipse #ever

I always have awkward relationships with the ladies for whatever reason. I don't know and so here we are. I was able to sort of take all of those terrible, terrible, terrible dates and turn them into a money making venture. ↗

— Jason Segel

#always #awkward #dates #here #i

I saw Dad's eyes widen just a fraction when he heard my voice catch. He glanced at me but quickly turned away. He didn't want me to see his reaction, but I did, and I'll never forget it. In that brief glimpse, I could see what he was thinking behind that fixed stare. There would be no grandkids, there would be no more Creed family bloodline, nothing else to look forward to. From that point on I'd become the last, most devastating disappointment in what he thought his life had added up to--one overwhelming failure. ↗

— Perry Moore

#disappointment #failure #gay #family

He leaned forward and plucked something out of my hair. “What—?” He held the dead leaf before me. “Must have gotten that rolling around with Alexi in the backyard.” I blinked and looked at him. “That sounded so wrong.” He nodded, eyebrow quirked. Waiting. “I’m trying to learn a few things from your more experienced brother so I’m ready for our big event.” His expression didn’t change. “Yee-ahhh. Not any better, huh?” I laughed. Our big event could mean two vastly different things to Pietr. “Lemme just run through the other ways I could get this wrong: Alexi’s teaching me some moves. He’s trying to put the hurt on me. He was putting me into some positions I’ve never tried before.…” I snorted. I couldn’t help myself. A muscle near Pietr’s left eye twitched. “He’s teaching me to fight!” I laughed, grabbing his wrists. ↗

— Shannon Delany

#puns #change