#ay

Even before I knew I was gay, I knew I didn't want to have a child. I knew I didn't want to have one. I never want to have to release it from me. Listen, I love babies. I love children. And I melt when I'm around them. I also love my freedom and I love that I can sleep at night. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#around #babies #before #child #children

I believe that summer is our time, a time for the people, and that no politician should be allowed to speak to us during the summer. They can start talking again after Labor Day. ↗

— Lewis Black

#again #allowed #believe #day #during

I don't need politicians doing a 24-hour prayer with Oral Roberts to get our country back on track. ↗

— Lewis Black

#country #doing #get #i #need

I do like men and I had, you know, a guy in high school that I wanted to marry desperately. He's the mayor of some small town in Texas. I could be the mayor's wife right now. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#desperately #guy #had #high #high school

I don't pay attention to the number of birthdays. It's weird when I say I'm 53. It just is crazy that I'm 53. I think I'm very immature. I feel like a kid. That's why my back goes out all the time, because I completely forget I can't do certain things anymore - like doing the plank for 10 minutes. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#attention #back #because #birthdays #certain

I just feel like every kid is growing up too fast and they're seeing too much. Everything is about sex, and that's fine for me. I'm not saying I don't like it. But I don't think it should be everywhere, where kids are exposed to everything sexual. Because they have to have some innocence; there's just no innocence left. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#because #every #everything #everywhere #exposed

I started playing golf when I was a kid, because across the street from where we lived there was a little nine-hole golf course where my father worked. ↗

— Lewis Black

#because #course #father #golf #golf course

I think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes your mind off that. ↗

— Lewis Black

#allows #crap #daily #golf #i

I would like to play Pebble Beach at some point. I keep waiting for them to call and ask me to that little pro-am thing, but I'm not big enough. ↗

— Lewis Black

#beach #big #big enough #call #enough

An actor really is a kind of intermediary between an audience and the piece, whether it's a play or movie. ↗

— Christopher Walken

#audience #between #intermediary #kind #movie