#bra

The x-ray of your skull shows a large, flobby mass floating inside. I have to consult my colleagues to be certain, but it looks like a long sausage snarled into a lump. ↗

— Benson Bruno

#funny #sausage #x-ray #funny

There ain't no "baby mama drama" up in this Vortex, homie! ↗

— Esther Hicks

#channeling-woo #funny #funny

I just don't know what I'd do without a brain, Simone!" I say. "I mean, what's a person without one? ↗

— Randa Abdel-Fattah

#brains #funny #funny

I'm a librarian in town,' she began. 'You sure about that?' The words popped out before he could stop them. Annabelle raised her eyebrows. 'Fairly. It's my job and so far no one has told me to go away when I show up for work.' smooth, Stryker, he thought, very smooth. 'I was expecting someone wearing glasses. You know. Because librarians read a lot.' The raised eyebrows turned into a frown. 'You need to get out of the barn more. ↗

— Susan Mallery

#awkward-encounters #foot-in-mouth #funny #librarians #shane

Cable TV brought the Braves into homes all across America in the 1970s, by the 1980s the Braves were “America’s Team,” and by the 1990s the Braves were the most dominant team in baseball. ↗

— Tucker Elliot

#baseball #home

One can never had too many librarian friends. ↗

— Jennifer Chiaverini

#librarians #friendship

I musn't run away. ↗

— Hideaki Anno

#depression #fear #instrumentality #life #shinji-ikari

No brain at all, some of them [people], only grey fluff that's blown into their heads by mistake, and they don't Think. ↗

— A.A. Milne

#eeyore #humor #thinking #thoughts #winnie-the-pooh

First rule of cleavage: it's not how low you go, but where and when you show. ↗

— Elisabeth Squires

#cleavage #elisabeth-dale #humor #style #women

I ran this through my "girl talk" translator and said, "I could eat him, if either of you'd like. Seems like it might be the easiest thing to do." -Bram to Nora & Pamela ↗

— Lia Habel

#humor #nora-dearly #humor