#carson

Since I didn't have a candy wrapper to help me with the bad connection I was about to have, I resorted to using vocal sound effects. When Agent Carson picked up, I started my performance. "Agent... Agent Carson," I said, panting into the phone. "Yes, Charley." She seemed unimpressed, but I wasn't about to stop now. "I--I know who the kshshshshshsh are." "I'm a little busy right now, Davidson. What is a Ksh, and why do I care?" "I'm sorry. My kshshsh... is kshshsh... ing." I repeat. What is a Ksh? And why do I care if it is ksh-ing?" She was a tough one. I knew I should have waited and bought a Butterfinger at the Jug-N-Chug. Those wrappers crakled like Rice Krispies on a Saturday morning. "You aren't listeni--kshshsh." "You're really bad at this." "Bank ro-ksh-ers. I know who they kshshsh." "Charley, if you don't cut this crap out." I hung up and turned off my phone before she could figure out what I was trying not to tell her and call back. ↗

— Darynda Jones

#charley-davidson #humour #business

If mouths cold commit the act, his made very hot, passionate love to mine last night. ↗

— Nicole Williams

#love

Like sex, seduction, and sin had decided to get it on and Cole Carson was the result. ↗

— Nicole Williams

#seduction

You must not lose faith, child. No matter what. Do not doubt God or his choosing of you. He knows infinitely more than we can imagine. ↗

— Rae Carson

#elisa #rae-carson #the-girl-of-fire-and-thorns #faith

I still have the shirt I wore my first time on Johnny Carson's show. Only now I use it as a tablecloth at dinner parties. It was very blousy. ↗

— Ellen DeGeneres

#dinner #dinner parties #first #first time #i

In 1980, when I graduated from high school, my goal was to be on 'The Tonight Show' with Johnny Carson at least once before our ten-year class reunion. Our class reunion was in June of 1990, and I was on 'The Tonight Show' in April 1990, so I made it by a few months. ↗

— Jeff Dunham

#before #carson #class #few #goal

It is possible for a kid from east Texas, raised in south central LA and Carson, who believes in his dreams, commits himself to them with his heart, to touch them and to have them happen. ↗

— Forest Whitaker

#carson #central #commits #dreams #east

The successful establishment of a buffer zone around Fort Carson will provide an example for other bases around the country as we seek to protect the training mission of the U.S. military while preserving critical habitats on our ranges. ↗

— Wayne Allard

#bases #buffer #carson #country #critical

According to Johnny Carson, I was the guy who Marlon sent out to do all the dirty work. ↗

— Jim Fowler

#carson #dirty #dirty work #guy #i

It's funny, I remember doing the Johnny Carson show, and, uh, I couldn't afford my rent. ↗

— Natalie Merchant

#carson #doing #funny #i #i remember