#eve

And for anyone who ever thought that Ellen and I broke it off because of sexuality, you couldn't be more mistaken. And for anyone who thought my mother's prayers had anything to do with me marrying a man, forget it. ↗

— Anne Heche

#anything #because #broke #ellen #ever

Before, I just spewed whatever it was I thought about everything. I tend to be more contemplative now. ↗

— Anne Heche

#before #contemplative #everything #i #just

He never admitted anything, even on his deathbed. He was a deluded liar. If it weren't for my father, I don't think I would be so open. So that's a huge blessing. ↗

— Anne Heche

#anything #blessing #deathbed #deluded #even

When you are coming out, you say it's for you. But when everybody says it's not OK, it becomes about that rather than about you. It disappointed me. ↗

— Anne Heche

#becomes #coming #disappointed #everybody #me

Ezra was right half the time, and when he was wrong, he was so wrong you were never in any doubt about it. ↗

— Ernest Hemingway

#any #doubt #half #never #right

If you look at all the pictures of women in magazines, everybody's got a forehead that looks like a billboard. Completely blank. ↗

— Amy Heckerling

#blank #completely #everybody #forehead #got

An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#break #convenience #escalator #just #never

I wish my name was Brian because maybe sometimes people would misspell my name and call me Brain. That's like a free compliment and you don't even gotta be smart to notice it. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#brain #brian #call #compliment #even

I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#business #came #casino #exit #fire

A severed foot is the ultimate stocking stuffer. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#severed #stocking #ultimate