#food

I was not miserable during this trial by fire. ↗

— Graydon Carter

#food

Really, Bob? Really?" asked the woman. "You think the best course of action is to spend an entire week's salary on food tickets? That's what you think? Because you want to hear gyros and fried cheesecake for the rest of the week? Not that I should be surprised. It's just the kind of harebrained thing you'd do." "Oh yeah, Sharon. Lay it on. Lay in on think. Right here in public where everyone can see!" The man, who was only a couple feet from me, lifted his arms and moved in a circle. "Did anyone not hear my lovely wife berating me? ↗

— Chloe Neil

#food

Firen didn’t waste any time setting up the meeting with Egnatious. The following day she was in such a rush to tell me about it that she burst into my room without knocking and found Andrew and me in an intimate and compromising position reminiscent of the game Twister. Also, I cannot confirm or deny if there was food involved. Let’s just say I toppled over in embarrassment, taking Andrew down with me in a great heap. Firen didn’t fare any better, as she nearly knocked herself out when she ran into the doorframe in an attempt to escape. We were both scarred for life, especially after Firen apologized for walking in on our “naked fun time,” which was apparently what Joseph called it. There were some things people should never know, and that was one of them. ↗

— Laura Kreitzer

#fallen-legion #fantasy #fiction #humor #laura-kreitzer

Our most important job as vegetable gardeners is to feed and sustain soil life, often called the soil food web, beginning with the microbes. If we do this, our plants will thrive, we’ll grow nutritious, healthy food, and our soil conditions will get better each year. This is what is meant by the adage ”Feed the soil not the plants. ↗

— Jane Shellenberger

#plants #soil #food

Goose neck is a delicacy. You have to at least try it. In fancy restaurants people pay up to fifty dollars a plate for this stuff.' And at our house we were force-fed it for free. Just another irony of life. ↗

— Janette Rallison

#humor #irony #food

An ordinary man can enjoy breakfasting on juice and rye bread. But when you are underfed, scorned, miserable or just plain bored, you don’t want to eat dull wholesome food. You want something a little more colourful, exciting, tastier, meatier and juicier. ↗

— R.S. Vern

#animated #cat-haee #cathaee #children-s-books #dark

Haggis" is a brand of nappies.' I said. 'They're good, we used them for our daughter.' 'Haggis is a kind of food too,' said Semyon, shaking his head. 'Although as far as taste goes, there's probably not much difference. ↗

— Sergei Lukyanenko

#haggis #humor #semyon #food

Pizza is like the entire food pyramid! ↗

— Madeline Oles

#humor #pizza #food

If you are able to introduce a white person to a new cheese, it's like introducing them to a future spouse. ↗

— Christian Lander

#food #humor #white-people #food

Should I have a doughnut or my disgusting cardboard?” asked Gwynn, as she drew up languidly before me at a study table in a bookstore on State Street, raising a puffed rice cake in the air. My eyes narrowed attentively at her face, but as I hesitated, she announced eagerly, “Disgusting cardboard it is! ↗

— Daniel Amory

#city #downtown #dream #food #law-school