#gramma

...punctuation marks are the traffic signals of language: they tell us to slow down, notice this, take a detour, and stop. ↗

— Lynne Truss

#punctuation #grammar

You're barely older than me.' 'Than I,' he corrected me with a little smile. ↗

— H.P. Mallory

#grammar-fail #grammar

When learning English as a second language, be sure to garble small words out of order in incomplete sentences. Then you'll have achieved the proficiency of a native speaker. ↗

— Bauvard

#funny #grammar #humor #funny

His sentences didn't seem to have any verbs, which was par for a politician. All nouns, no action. ↗

— Jennifer Crusie

#humor #politics #humor

Oh -- who's the Queen?" "Her, of course. The White Queen. You're just like Alice, you know. Down the rabbit hole with the Mad Hatter. ↗

— Rachel Caine

#gramma #morganville-vampires #morganville-vampires

I was a little excited but mostly blorft. "Blorft" is an adjective I just made up that means 'Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.' I have been blorft every day for the past seven years. ↗

— Tina Fey

#grammar-humor #humor #stress #humor

It is very useful, when one is young, to learn the difference between "literally" and "figuratively." If something happens literally, it actually happens; if something happens figuratively, it feels like it is happening. If you are literally jumping for joy, for instance, it means you are leaping in the air because you are very happy. If you are figuratively jumping for joy, it means you are so happy that you could jump for joy, but are saving your energy for other matters. ↗

— Lemony Snicket

#humor #language #humor

If you can spell "Nietzsche" without Google, you deserve a cookie. ↗

— Lauren Leto

#grammar #humor #spelling #humor

Nothing could go wrong because nothing had...I meant "nothing would." No - Then I quit trying to phrase it, realizing that if time travel ever became widespread, English grammar was going to have to add a whole new set of tenses to describe reflexive situations - conjugations that would make the French literary tenses and the Latin historical tenses look simple. ↗

— Robert A. Heinlein

#humor #science-fiction #time-travel #humor

Stupid English." "English isn't stupid," I say. "Well, my English teacher is." He makes a face. "Mr. Franklin assigned an essay about our favorite subject, and I wanted to write about lunch, but he won't let me." "Why not?" "He says lunch isn't a subject." I glance at him. "It isn't." "Well," Jacob says, "it's not a predicate, either. Shouldn't he know that? ↗

— Jodi Picoult

#grammar #humor #school #humor