#hum

Yes," I said. "My name is seven-five-nine-nine-three-nine-ex-dash-one. Junior. ↗

— James Patterson

#humor

Who's that little brunette?" Suzanne asked. "I hate little petite types. Gregory doesn't look right with someone petite. Little face, little hands, little dainty feet." "Big boobs," Beth said, glancing up. ↗

— Elizabeth Chandler

#gregory #humor #petite #suzanne #humor

Where are you going?” “To get a Coke!” “Would you—” “No! ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor

I so rarely have the chance to field-test anything. Amelie is so conservative about these things -Myrnin ↗

— Rachel Caine

#humor #myrnin #humor

No. Haven’t you been listening?” Marcus would always remember that moment. It was to be the first time he would ever be faced with that most vexing of female quirks: the question that had nothing but wrong answers. ↗

— Julia Quinn

#humor

Oh, don't cough, Ernest. When one is dictating one should speak fluently and not cough. Besides, I don't know how to spell a cough. ↗

— Oscar Wilde

#humor

Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while ↗

— Groucho Marx

#humor

Sex had been amazing, but it wasn't a magical cure for everything. Damn. Somewhere along the way, I'd picked up common sense. ↗

— Richelle Mead

#rose-hathaway #humor

Student: Dr. Einstein, Aren't these the same questions as last year's [physics] final exam? Dr. Einstein: Yes; But this year the answers are different. ↗

— Albert Einstein

#science #humor

We have now left Reason and Sanity Junction. Next stop, Looneyville. ↗

— Jim Butcher

#harry-dresden #humor #insanity #humor