#hum

If she happens to fall, I'll be there to laugh at first and then help her up afterwards. ↗

— J.A. Redmerski

#humor

Hey, precious.” A pretty brunette slid to Tristan’s side out of the blue. Precious? Who does she think she is? Gollum? ↗

— Tatiana Vila

#humor

This may be impossible for you to believe," Colt said in a hushed voice, "but as recently as last year, I was a hyper, naive-albeit extremely good-looking-minor myself." "And now you're a persistent, outdoorsy, unshaven man-boy who cavorts with clones of your former self?" Colt plucked a round stone out of the water. "I prefer boy-man, but the rest of the sentence sounded fairly accurate. ↗

— Karsten Knight

#humor #man #humor

The hippo of recollection stirred in the muddy waters of the mind. ↗

— Terry Pratchett

#humor #memory #metaphor #recollection #humor

My dad told me that when I was born my cheeks were so fat the doctors didn't know which end to spank. ↗

— Sean Covey

#humor #humor

Hexen stehen immer zwischen Birken ↗

— Walter Moers

#horror #humor #humor

Dora appeared, placing Alex's coffee in front of him."Your girlfriend is a wonder, honey,"she siad to him, squeezing willows shoulder. Willow's smile turned strained at the word "girlfriend. He could see her wanting to correct the woman and then deciding to let it pass. ↗

— L.A. Weatherly

#humor

I suppose you're right about some perspectives. Just a few weeks ago, I thought you were a dickhead. ↗

— Mary E. Pearson

#humor

Vortexy. "Is that even a word?" I ask myself "You're talking to yourself, so who the hell cares?" I reply ↗

— Gayle Forman

#humor #humor

Forget him, he's just another red-shirted extra making a cameo appearance in our lives. ↗

— Adrian McKinty

#humor