#hum

She just threatened to throw the next man who shoots at you out the window. Megan is awake. She offered to help. God, Trent, what is it with you and women? ↗

— Kim Harrison

#into-the-woods #jenks #the-hollows #trent-kalamack #humor

I burned through all of my extra lives in a matter of minutes, and my two least-favorite words appeared on the screen: GAME OVER. ↗

— Ernest Cline

#nerd #video-games #humor

I‘ve said it once and I will say it again, why can‘t everyone just speak English? The Americans give it a bit of a go — why can‘t other nations? ↗

— Louise Rennison

#humor

If I knew me as somebody else, I would hate me just as much. Why have a double standard? ↗

— David Wong

#humor #humor

I lay there in my black slip dress and wondered if I ought to have worn pants. I mean, who knew what I was going to find up there? What if I had to do some climbing? People might see my underwear. ↗

— Meg Cabot

#humor #humor

I added to my mental list of the odd things I'd done that day. I'd entertained the police, sunbathed, visited at a mall with some fairies, weeded and killed someone. Now it was powdered-corpse removal time. And the day wasn't over yet. ↗

— Charlaine Harris

#humor

I used to think that looking across a pillow into the fabulous face of Buster Keaton would be a more thrilling destiny than any screen career. ↗

— Anita Loos

#sex #stardom #humor

We're of one mind, Grenville and I, and the mind is hers, on account of my being a man and not having one. ↗

— Loretta Chase

#vere #humor

Not only is he mentally challenged, all he has is a couple of scary fangs and absolutely no idea what kind of fire is in this furnace. ↗

— Jayde Scott

#humor #jayde-scott #humor

I have an iron deficiency. You can tell by how wrinkled my clothes are.  ↗