#hum

And you had to do that in a thunderstorm pissing down like a camel? ↗

— Poppet

#paranormal-urban-fantasy-romance #urban-fantasy

Take your finger out of your nose, Miss Steal. ↗

— Fanny Merkin

#humor #funny

Bett didn't have any siblings because she said her father had preserved what was dead for too long to be able to create life. When Bet was younger and had begged for one, her father gave her a marmot he' stuffed for a man from Wyoming. "This is your brother Christopher," he'd said, placing the marmot on Bett's pillow one night. "He doesn't talk much, so you'll have to pick up the slack there. ↗

— Rebecca Rasmussen

#humor #siblings #family

You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute. ↗

— Ambrose Bierce

#revenge #vanity #women #humor

Saf keeps a vast range of bullies on hand at all times. ↗

— Kristin Cashore

#humor

never underestimate your dumbness!! ↗

— Jim Benton

#humor

Writing historical fiction is a legitimate us of Multiple Personality Disorder. ↗

— Peggy Ullman Bell

#historical-fiction

This building fool could only be Bess of Hardwicke, a woman whose name is seldom seen in print without the word “redoubtable” in front of it. I wondered if anyone ever called her redoubtable to her face. I redoubted it. ↗

— Joann Spears

#historical-fiction #six-of-one-by-joann-spears #tudors #women-s-humor #historical-fiction

Why do relationships have to be so complicated? ↗

— Erin Hunter

#lionblaze #truth #humor

Why don't you just buy me a minivan, zip me into mom jeans, and shoot me in the face" - Melanthe the potential Queen of Persuasions: ↗

— Kresley Cole

#humor